This is a very complicated line to draw here, between what makes sense and what doesn't. For example, yeah, it's a bit annoying that you constantly have your companions scrying on you, and that they react to every single littlest thing you do. But like Ragny just said having then react to big things is good. If you want a more responsive approval system they need to be able to tell the difference between big and small things.
So maybe Wyll don't react to you stealing candy from a tiefling kid if he isn't in the party. But if you side against the tieflings he still reacts to it, because it still reaches his ear, so to speak.
But that adds workload and stuff, so maybe it's a too high expectation to put on them. And if I had to choose between a system where companions either react to everything whether they're in the party or not, or a system where they only react if they're in the party no matter how egregious-to-their-morals acts you commit, then I would choose what we have now.