Larian Studios Forums General Chat It's sad when...

Sure Kiya.
I don't want people think I am a woman when thinking about me and talking to me.
You see, when I see in a forum a person with female avatar and nick, I think she is a woman and plan my actions accordingly. Even flirt, right?

We always approach differently when speaking to man or woman.

If my words sounded descriminating, I appologize, I didn't keep this in mind.
My poor english doesn't give me freedom to express everything I wanna say. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/puppyeyes.gif" alt="" />

No, doesn't sound discriminating, Egin - but I still didn't understand. So, you don't want to be flirted at? Yes, I can understand this part - it gets on my nerves, too - boring.

If you can: the different approach is still interesting for me -> try to explain a little bit. I mean, this is a game forum, correct? So the approach is directed at Div, strategies answers, hints etc. => gender difference then? I don't think so, more a difference in approaching the game. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />
Kiya

I have a female ava - and I was asked by several gamers about my gender, because some thought I was just a great fan of her - as a male.

We are speaking about this in general. I haven't addressed it personal to anyone. Maybe I am oldfashioned, but I don't like when man is using female avatar/nick and vise versae. This is my opinion <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Erm, what kind of name for a male is Kiya? Sounds pretty female to me. I'm not making fun of your name, I just don't see how it sounds masculine at all.



I second that. It screws me over too. If you see someone with a female avatar and femalish name, what else are you supposed to assume?

If I used a female avatar and went by the name Courtney it would be my own fault for people thinking I was female, and vice versa if a female uses a male avatar and a malish sounding name.

No, doesn't sound discriminating, Egin - but I still didn't understand. So, you don't want to be flirted at? Yes, I can understand this part - it gets on my nerves, too - boring.
----
Nah, I didn't say that. I don't want somebody start flirting with me thinking I am a woman.
I hate to find out that after I was flirting with a person thinking that she is a woman because she was using female ava and nick, but there was actually man instead just using female ava and nick for fun or I donno for what purpose else. Yek.
----
I mean, this is a game forum, correct?
-----
Yep <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />
------
So the approach is directed at Div, strategies answers, hints etc. => gender difference then? I don't think so, more a difference in approaching the game. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />
Kiya
-------
But, we are in "chat section", right? We discuss many different things here besides games. Even ingame woman and man will act in many cases differently.
-------
I have a female ava - and I was asked by several gamers after my gender, because some thought I was just a great fan of her - as a male.
------
I assume these gamers already have experience to chatting with a man behind female avatar <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

You are completely right but it would not be !


I have the same problem ! It's hard to communicate when you have language problems.

Thank you for your patience, Egin <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" /> . This leads to my next question: Why is it a problem if a male gamer has a female nick/ava, is flirted at and you feel duped after finding out? Has this something to do with homophobia? (Fear of feeling/being treated like a homosexual?) Or are there other reasons? Please, keep this in mind: Div is my very first forum, so I'm lacking a lot of knowledge in this relationship area.

Could this gender muddle be a result from broken hearts for people making this XP in chat forums, where you flirt and search for mates? I have never visited something of this kind - so, don't laugh about my naivity, please.
Kiya <getting more and more curious>

@Mick: Nope, it was not about my nick - BG gamers know Viconia (my ava) and some male gamers are a fan of her. I recall a gamer telling me he would have liked to take this ava if I had not occupied her already because he likes her a lot. And I understood this simply as a hommage from a gamer wanting to have a connection to this fascinating char from Baldur's Gate - nothing else.

Kiya may be known by strategy gamers having played Pharao. It's simply the name of a noble Ancient Egyptian clan (was in the female section there to choose from)

Pfft, trying being 22 and goodlooking and never had a girlfriend. Then you're sad. You'll still be young, but still sad nevertheless.



Pffft, I'd gladly pick a female over gaming anyday :P



Pffft, you should see my eyes. Actually, maybe you shouldn't. First thing you'd do is get a visa, fly to the US and never leave :P



Pffft, like you have a choice about waiting :P



BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 0wned

(sorry kiya :P)

I realise it was because of your avatar (I know who Viconia is, I've succesfully romanced her) but your name was a dead giveaway that you're female for me.

You are completely right but it would not be !
-----
Barta, It would not be who or what?



Kiya


To be fair I don't know what does this homofobia means, but I really don't like the idea of being treated like a gay. This makes me feel very uncomfortable. This is ugly.
I do like women, I have to confess, I like to flirt (note, flirt with women only). Life without flirt is like food without salt. Flirt is not just some kind of joke it is programmed into all human beings. By flirting I show to woman that she is attractive and if she responds with a flirt then I feel happy, whether this happends at work, in supermarket, in forum or chatroom or anywhere else. This is how I see things.

For me, it has to do with being straight. I like women, not men, so I'd prefer not to flirt with men.

Homophobia is disliking someone simply because they are gay. The only time I've ever disliked a gay person, wasn't so much because they were gay, but because they wouldn't leave me alone and quit hitting on me. Then again, I wouldn't be terribly happy if a female I wasn't interested in kept hitting on me. Since no females hit on me, this isn't a problem I've had to face a whole lot.



For me it's just because I like to know who I am talking to and have a basic knowledge of them. Their gender being part of that basic knowledge, mainly because I talk to males and females differently in real life as I do online.

I couldn't say better. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" />

Barta


rofl <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
Sorry for quoting that Marian... Hehe, ok I'm not <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> It's just funny <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

I give up - don't understand <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shame.gif" alt="" /> - gender is/was totally unimportant for me, be it RL or internet. I'm interested in the individual, sharing interests etc. - and what I like about the internet is this: I'm not distracted by my eyes, I can concentrate on the words or what is between the lines, no body language to conclude in my reaction then. Why should there be a difference in my thoughts/judgement just because some words come from a female and the same might be from male lips/hands?

I rest my case, thanks to those answering - I simply don't understand <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/disagree.gif" alt="" />
Kiya <coming from a different planet>

I'm interested in the idividual as well, but like I said, I approach males and females differently.

Generally speaking, females tend to be easier to upset by something a person says, but they also seem to be more open to taking a joke. Whereas males tend to get defensive if you play a joke on them and aren't quite so easy to upset.

Because of this, I tend to be nicer to females whereas I tend to be more sarcastic and insulting to males because I know they can handle the insults better. I also joke around and pull stupid third grade pranks on females more than I do with males, because females tend to be able to take a joke better.

These are the guidelines I follow until I get to know a person better and learn their limits and what they can and can't handle.

Remember, I'm not saying *all* females and males are this way, it's just the majority, and so far it's proven to be true in my life.

Oh, and I'm just nicer to females because I prefer having female friends because they are much better listeners and more pleasant to just be around.

I'm nice to people who are nice to me and not-so-nice to those who aren't - regardless of age, gender, nationality, hair colour, breed, race, amount of legs, sexual preference. I go for the respect approach, give and get in return or not. I met the same amount of nice/nasty races everywhere, no gender distinction found out yet. Maybe my decoder in this part is defect.

Kiya <looking for her space ship to return to her individualistic planet>

Don't worry, Kya. It's just me. I'm racist and sexist. I thought everyone knew that.

<tapping her decoder> Ah, now I understand, Mick <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/exclamation.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" /> - yes, I know the meaning of racist/sexist <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kissyou.gif" alt="" />

And what's Egin then? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />
Kiya

He's just a chauvinstic pig. With little Practise he'll become a full fledged racist or sexist.

Only the greats, like me, get to become a master racist and a master sexist all in one.

@ Egin
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We always approach differently when speaking to man or woman.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You are completely right because most of the people, me too, have a different approach with a man or a woman.
But we would not have a different approach because we are not different, except physically.


If a man make a mistake and think that you are a women, he do not treat you as a gay !
You just have to tell him : sorry i am not a women.
But if a man think that you are a man and try to flirt with you, in this case he treat you as a gay.
I understand that you would not like it but it could happen and it is not insulting.
The only thing to do is to say to this person in a PM : I am not a gay, i like women.
The same thing could happen with a woman that you do not like !

@ Kejero


Why did you quote it ? He is going to kill me <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif" alt="" />

@ Kiya


I agree with you. I have the same interest to talk with women and men in this forum.
Sometimes it is hard because we do not live in the same country, we do not have the same culture and we have language problems but it's interesting.
As Lucretia said : who always learn new things.

Barta