Thoughts on aggression, excluding and reactions towards both:
Why does one feel aggression? Mostly due to fear, feeling threatened, wanting to protect - it's easier to get angry then and bite the aggressor, exclude her/him => gives the feeling/illusion to have control of a situation, protecting oneself or the group/individuum that is being attacked - whereas fear lets one feel the helpless, blocked emotion of being a victim, unable to protect oneself let alone others.
And why fear and the resulting aggression then towards the aggressor? Lies partly within oneself and partly within the other.
If I have no fear against gays, gothics, outsiders etc. => I need not feel aggression, there is nothing I need to protect myself from, they are no threat for myself - their differing opinion is no insult of mine. This still does not protect me from reaction towards a person reacting aggressive, because outer aggression triggers the other part => wanting to protect - bypasses thinking and targets gut instincts directly. So, if both sides lose control of their brain, this results in dog fighting, a growing, swirling spiral of verbal violence.
Solution? I think self-control and self-questioning could be a way, maybe in this manner:
Why am I angry?
Where is my fear, am I covering it up and WHAT am I fearing?
What buried incident within myself was triggered?
Is it old bottled-up fear/anger, looking for an outlet?
What am I fighting? Myself or what I refuse to acknowledge in myself but project unto the other person/group?
Where do I feel threatened?
Can I still see the indivual annoying me or is she/he a "symbol" for something I fight?
Do I disagree with a certain kind of behaviour and am able to express this or do I disagree with the whole person?
Am I in control of my emotions now?
Do these questions and given answers prevent me from speaking up then? Nope, hope not - just helping me to sort out inner/outer emotional mess, find clarity within myself and in my outer reaction. Not always easy - but we've got brains, right? Let's start using them <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> (I've heard rumours it doesn't hurt <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> )
Kiya
Errhm, for those with a short attention span <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> => think first, get angry later <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />
