About my forum: Actually only the Top 25% of them arent showing up because the host of them is undergoing maitenance, all the rest do show up. If you get an error just clikc the link again, I dont know why but that just happens sometimes for no reason.
The point is, buddy. That I have already dedicated my life to her, Its not like I can take it back. You dont say YES to a marriege proposal and change your mind, God forbids that with the exception of adultry. Its supposed to be a tough commitment, and is sometimes not worth it but most of ythe time its great.
Now that I am saved and a saint, My mind works differently, When I met MT (The girl in question) I just wanted a girl to screw, and thats what I got, But Ive changed and now ive learned to love her. And the girl Before MT was before I was saved and screwing was all i wanted, and that kinda ruined her... so many guys wanting just to screw her now she just goes along with it and can be by any standard considered a whore, which makes me feel terrible because she used to be so sweet.
BEing alone my entire life wasnt by choice. I struggle with it but if you ask me to dance, even alone. It would be impossible, not physically but my mind just wont let it happen. I dont talk or do anything in public places but be silent, yes this is damaging what MT and I share, but then again she is the direct opposite and will never sit still or shut up. It usually works out perfectly that way, but sometimes she feels deprived, which sucks because i really want her to be happy, Ill do anything that isnt morally unacceptable (EX: GO to beach and let her wear bikini, dont kid yourself if a chick is wearing that it turns on anyone that looks.) Maybe I am restrictive but I didnt write the rulebook, and so far I havnt had trouble complying to any of the rules of life. Being with her unless I plan to spend my life with her is a sin on its own, and I will not allow my life ot be one big sin. I plan to put up with anything to be with her, because eventually I know she will understand the ways of the Lord and will be changed.
