Larian Studios Forums General Chat The self-confidence thread.

IN death Ill lose all of this useless crap besides LOVE. LOve is all that is eternal, and so is life. I know i am going to live forever and GOd wants me to. This makes me very happy, But ever since i learned this to be true I have wanted nothing more then to share this with her. I have been her servant for the past year and enjoyed it... But to me heaven isnt worth it without her, and Living every day like its the last.. I do that because I know anyday could be the last, Thats why I work to make every day to be a day that if it was the end that God wouldnt disapouinted with me. I went trhough the normal I lost the love of my life situation before, but this time its different, Ive promised her my life forever, So if she leaves me I am still hers to come back to..... I cannot break this promise so being with another woman is completely out of the question, and friends are so short lived and I dont care to have anythiung but love... I guess I will just have ot be alone forever, you know its not my choice to be by myself. My entire life it has been impssoible for me to have anyone around me, She changed all of this and gave me something no one else could.. Heck for her God gave me the strength to dance once, I FREAKING DANCED! that is more impssoble to me then flying away on a broom!

Love is much more than just a feeling - it's a Philosophy ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

At least for Hawaiians ... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

(Hint : Look into my signature ... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> )

Its not a philosophy, its the foundation of this earth, if God's love wasnt here he would have obliterated us long ago.

Hey man, this thing about self-confidence, i'm bad a lot on this too, these kind of questions come to me time from time when i'm doing some things like reading the book for example, it's a litle strange these many whyS.

Well if someday i found the answers i'll let you know.

ok i avoided this thread for too long. Can someone summarize this whole thing for me? im still kinda unsure what everyone is talking about and i don't want to say something that your not talking about and so forth.

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/alien.gif" alt="" />

virgo, it's about self-esteem & how to improve it. of course, one can also share experiences & lessons learnt in life. it's the least we can do to help one another.

byblos, even if it's hard for u to believe this; i was in your situation for quite a number of years. in fact, 'twas almost a decade of pain & suffering.

but i got over it. fact is: God kicked me over it. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" />

dude, don't look upon yourself to get through this. look upon The Dude whom His name was mentioned quite a number of times in your posts. God.

u can PM me anytime.

Hey I have God and im fine in him and he has so many great things in store for me, but I dont want any of it without her at my side. I kinda feel the same way he does, What he wants more then anything is us to love him by choice and for us to choose to be with him, and thats how I feel. I have eternal life ahead of me but It doesnt seem worth it without her love. Sometimes God seems so human. Deep down we have the same desires, To love and to be loved. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Ill live, I wont kill myself or anything, but sometimes I just wish it were over, so I wouldnt miss her so much. I already went through this similar thing with another Girl but that was before I was saved and on the path of rightousness. IVe been alone my whole life and then She came into it, and then God. And I dont see being happy without either of them.

@Byblos

being interested in art myself I tried to look at your pics, but none of them are appearing. And links give me 404 errors.

on topic -
If I may be blunt----
If you believe you're going to 'pine' for this girl for the rest of your life and you'll never find, or don't want to find anyone else - then I say go to a counsellor (if you haven't already) and seek guideance on this issue. It would seem you don't have the emotional development to deal with these issues, we don't have the training to help, so you should seek it professionally.

You said 'I already went through this similar thing with another Girl but that was before I was saved and on the path of rightousness...'

So it's happened before, and then so will probably happen again. But what's this 'I was saved and on the path of rightousness' - what was so wrong about it?

If you're desperate to be loved, you'll find no one will, because most people despise desperation - it makes you act a certain way and it's not attractive. Also, if you dote on someone and be a lap dog, then they would likely get bored.
Not saying you do any of that...but it's an impression I get.

To sum up, some emotional strings aren't attached as tightly as they should be, I suggest you seek professional guidence and tighten them up. Accepted that you're going to be alone is the quitters way out, the easy option...how about being brave and get the help. Now that's courage. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" />

About my forum: Actually only the Top 25% of them arent showing up because the host of them is undergoing maitenance, all the rest do show up. If you get an error just clikc the link again, I dont know why but that just happens sometimes for no reason.

The point is, buddy. That I have already dedicated my life to her, Its not like I can take it back. You dont say YES to a marriege proposal and change your mind, God forbids that with the exception of adultry. Its supposed to be a tough commitment, and is sometimes not worth it but most of ythe time its great.
Now that I am saved and a saint, My mind works differently, When I met MT (The girl in question) I just wanted a girl to screw, and thats what I got, But Ive changed and now ive learned to love her. And the girl Before MT was before I was saved and screwing was all i wanted, and that kinda ruined her... so many guys wanting just to screw her now she just goes along with it and can be by any standard considered a whore, which makes me feel terrible because she used to be so sweet.

BEing alone my entire life wasnt by choice. I struggle with it but if you ask me to dance, even alone. It would be impossible, not physically but my mind just wont let it happen. I dont talk or do anything in public places but be silent, yes this is damaging what MT and I share, but then again she is the direct opposite and will never sit still or shut up. It usually works out perfectly that way, but sometimes she feels deprived, which sucks because i really want her to be happy, Ill do anything that isnt morally unacceptable (EX: GO to beach and let her wear bikini, dont kid yourself if a chick is wearing that it turns on anyone that looks.) Maybe I am restrictive but I didnt write the rulebook, and so far I havnt had trouble complying to any of the rules of life. Being with her unless I plan to spend my life with her is a sin on its own, and I will not allow my life ot be one big sin. I plan to put up with anything to be with her, because eventually I know she will understand the ways of the Lord and will be changed.

Byblos, you say that life isn't worth it without her. Why is your worth in someone else? I think like you do as well. I'm careful at what I accept because I keep my promises. But the person you made that promise with doesn't exist anymore. Her body's still inhabited, but if she's changed so much that you don't matter in her life, then she's not who you loved. You fell in love with someone who cared about you. The promise can no longer be fulfilled.

Doctors promise to save your loved one, but when they die, the doctors give up and move on. They don't keep pumping drugs into a corpse in case some miricle occurs.

Honestly, counselling is an alright option. I had only one session after breaking up with Alex. It helped imesnely. He didn't solve any of my problems but helped me see them in another way so I could solve them.


Why are you silent. I'd take a guess that you're scared of finding someone other than MT. You are denying that you are single. "Couples don't act in the way you'd like to." Only if you say it's so. Coupled people can dance with others and have fun with others and even platonically share a bed with someone of the opposite sex, but only if you say you can. You set the rules in your life. If God sets your rules then have a careful look at them and see if he really is stopping you from taking what benefit you can from life.

thanks for sharing, HEF. that means a lot.

byblos, plowking & HEF mean well when they suggested therapy. i agree to that as well. heck, if u don't want to, go talk with a priest or pastor that u can trust & respect.

wish we can help, like HEF said it; we're no professionals.

byblos, u're not being fair to MT, the way i see it. u're setting her up to fail. the things u expect from her; to be with u forever & be the same girl u first met & fell in love with ..... nobody in the whole existence of humankind can fit in that mould u created. every single one of us has flaws & like it or not, we change. i handled my problem worse than u. i was so close to ..... well let's say i won't be going that way anymore.

what i'm saying is that u have the capacity of reasoning (better than i was back then). make use of it while u have it to get yourself better. go get help. wish i can help but i'm afraid i might make it worse for u. by giving wrong advise, saying the wrong things, .... .

dude, if we're in the same town, i would've drag u to get help.

again, u can always PM me anytime.

It isnt my worth that is in her, to God I am precious, but my enjoyment and human companionship is in her.

Well if shes would die, I wouldnt want that to happen.. I would just hope she is on the same side as me when I get there.

I am silent, I met MT by accident trhough another Silent girl I used to talk to sometimes! MT forced it outn of me!

about your last statement... The world has no moral value, lives for sin and for pleasure of the flesh, and it sickens me and God. I would rather burn in hell then to live for pleasure as a sinner. Which is the opposite of what will happen. Give up sin and live forever, the perfect covenant.

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I did see a counselour about the silentity (if thats a word) and he just keeps saying its because I dont know who my biological dad is, Like give a crap.. I study physcology and know the ruotine, they usually try to convince you that your problem is something that it is not and give you pills. Maybe some actually help but none ive ever seen.

Unless you have what I have, A friendship with God, you cannot understand how I feel. I really wish this whole world would be close to God, as our nation was at its birth....

YOu want ME to talk to priest? lol, as far as i know priests are the biggest blastphemers and sinners of us all, Who do they think they are requesting to be caleld father? Even Jesus who IS God refused to let people call him that! And the whole tell me your sins so your safe bullcrap makes me sick, no person has any right to know your sins, and no person can help you with them. If you have sins on your concious tell god yourself personally, Like this "God, I know your there and care for me, and I know ive done something wrong and im sorry." If you say and feel tha way, the promise of eternal life is yours!

So god gave humans and animals reproductive organs why? So he can be sickend by the people who do it for pleasure?

Sounds like giving a child some sweets and telling them you're never allowed to eat them unless you swear before god in the bonds of matrimonial sweet eating -

I'm an atheist so I don't have any of your beliefs, nor would I attempt to tell you god doesn't exist etc. etc. etc.....each to his own.



What is this sin? Sex out of marriage? Plus I thought your god was forgiving...



Well yes...I would guess so. So in short...we can't help in any way because your beliefs have imprisioned you, it would seem. But that's not how'd you see it at all so I'll leave it at that

also, this thread is not about religion, it's about self-confidence - and clearly your 'problems' stem from your religious beliefs that you can't do a, b or c or you'll end up in hell, or something. Perhaps if you met a girl with beliefs in line with yours? That's possible....

Try the local asylum.....

There are actually 5,000 females with the same belifs as me that go to the same chapel as me.

HE gave them for pleasure, but not for sin, and sex outside of marriage is Sin. Its not his fault the rules are to strict for us. its our fault.

God is forvigin, hell forgive anything you do If you just ask.

Living in Sin, Drunkedness, GLuttony, Sexual sin. Those three live in most Americans.

My problem isnt religion because I despise religion, which is defined as a Belief when what I know is sure fact. Calling God a religeon is like saying beliveing mars exists is a religion which is not true.

Improisoned? Yeah Im impriseoned by temptation, you know the feelings too. Once I pass from this world I will be freed from temptaions of my sinful heart!

My problem that is out of my control is my ability to relate with others because I am dead silent, and God has nothing to do with this directly as ive been this way my entire life.

Do they really? Or do not perhaps think that maybe it's even deeper than the religious connection...

Even the words you use, females instead of women, and the whole 'Silent' thing is odd too. Do you mean shy?

Here's what I think - you're emotionally deficient in some way, and it's not because of your religion - you can still be as religious as you want and have a great life if you sort some of those issues out!

How old are you? Your upbringing to this point must have lacked something (maybe the father figure that was hinted a few posts back) and you're not willing to put it right because you think consellors can't help, you know better, and finally, god will sort it all out when you die.

I say...give me some booze, 3 women on my lap, and let me party... (ok just my fiance will do... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" /> )

Its not religion its truth..

I say females because their ages range from 15-85!

I dont have a religion.

I have always had a father around, he just isnt te biological one.

God will sort what out when I die? WHen I die he will heal all that ails me, theres no sorting out to do.

You have the choice to enjoy your flesh but that same choice is the path to... not heaven... I prefer to think of it as oblivion instead of Hell.

Fair enough...seem to have some contradictions in there...no religion?? But believe in Jesus...and whether you pray or not, that's deemed a religion (i.e. a belief system based on certain ideals - a strong belief in a supernatural power or powers that control human destiny)

Praying? Of course I pray, pray means to talk to god.

No contradiction just different perception, If you have a so called religion that is admiting that it is just a belief, but what I have is truth, not just to me or its what i think. Its what I know, so calling it a religion takes away from what it really is, which is more the belif its truth. But if to you religion means, Knowing God, then you can call it religion but I will not.