Janggut: i was torn between ending her struggle & helping her to get through it. who am i to judge that it's time for her to cease when she might have hope & at the same time, i have no right to prolong her painful life?
things like this, i am very much undecided but i would pray for guidance.
Oh, yes - I understand you very well in this. My decision ist not made easily, Janggut. And though I should have more XP now in "knowing" - it's always the same old struggle as if it were the very first time - one I dread very much, as I have to find out if I can't stand a cat's struggle anymore (I call this cowardice and is no reason for me to push her over the line)- or if she wishes to die herself. Therefore I always call for the Doc's consent as well. Same for my fresh-water fish. I dread "playing God", this responsibility is indeed burdening.
About braindead (coma?), I have talked very often with my friend about this. She told me she greeted this and was not happy to be called back, but she accepted it in these occasions that her time had not come to cross the line for good (and I would try to call her back or "contact" her - just to make sure what her decision really is). She and I have a similar opinion towards spirituality and a very close bond. I hope, I need not fulfill my promise - as I am no relative, I can't/or will not ask the Docs to switch off her machines. No, my promise was about ending her life when she is conscious and asks me explicitely. If it had been entirely up to the Docs she would have been dead already, as they had given her up (she's a puzzle for them). In case anyone wonders => she is not only my best friend but my spiritual teacher as well.
If anyone wants to end her/his life because of a severe pain of the heart (emotionally meant) I take this death wish differently, as my XP so far shows, the death wish is more a wish to end this pain and not die. Here I react differently. No, I don't talk life nice or swing the hammer of religious forbiddings - I try to help by showing this person that she/he is at a crossroad - and a crossroad has several paths to follow, several choices, only one leads to physical death, not all. I try to encourage to look at all roads leading from this. In any case => what I consider important is taking a death wish sincerely and not refusing to talk about this or dodging.
And in my own case? As I have dealt with death several times - sometimes I call it a friend, sometimes a foe - each confrontation with a person standing at this crossroad helped me to make a future decision for my own death clearer - what I need to live and will fight for - or when I wish someone to aid me if I have decided for myself (and only for myself) to let go and cross the line. So, I am very grateful for this XP. Kiya
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Kris: Some religions will not even allow certain positive modern medical interventions, (blood transfusions, etc )
Oh, yes - this is what makes my blood boil!!! So-called religion, I call it - manmade religion, I call this. Religion should respect life and aid, not club down. Religion as a cage, a prison, I call this. Depriving oneself to make own decisions and choose in a self-responsible way. ARGH! I was 14 when a Jehovah Witness of 16 was sentenced to death by this. And it was her religion who drove her to this suicidal attempt in the first place. Or to be exact => it was humans and their interpretations about religion.
I respect and admire every person who is embedded in a belief, if this helps to feel protected (even by crossing the line) - and I have met these persons as well. Though I did not share their belief, I saw and felt how protected they felt - and this was beautiful for me. And sad as well for me, if these "teachers" crossed the line.
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Kris: On the cat subject, I currently have an 18 year old cat who seems to be "on the edge". She seems happy enough but is showing many of the signs of getting near the end. Of course, I'm hoping for a peaceful 'natural' death, but with my previous 2 cats it ended with visits to the vet to help with their end.
Yes, I thankfully made this XP about natural death as well - it was a cat of a colleague's father. He was too old and my colleague was too scared. So I took her in and took care of her in the last 3 days - she really passed away peacefully, without a struggle - and I was at her side.
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Kris: Kiya, I very much admire your determination to stand by your friend. I hope that your loyalty is never subjected to such a test, but she is very lucky to have somebody like you to give such support.
You know what? I felt very honoured when she asked me - her trust is a gift for me (honoured and scared at the same time - and determined not to disappoint this trust)
