Larian Studios Forums General Chat Consumer Labels

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods that can be found today being sold in stores nationwide:

-On Sears hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping."

(But..., that's the only time I have to work on my hair <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />)

-On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):
"Do not turn upside down."

(Oops, too late! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />)

-On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body."

(But wouldn't this save even more time? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />)

Know any others? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" />

You mean like those useless info in manuals like:
Do not put your hands on the lawn-mower knives while in use. (Why is that? )

Keep away from food (rat poison) (and I was planning on using it in my famous cake) <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />

Keep away from children (playmobile car) (No problem, I bought it for my fisch anyway)

Do not handle in when raining (videocamera) (But I wanted to film in the house! Still no? )

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
Things like that, yes. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

-On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."

(And that would be how. . . <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />)

-On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestions: Defrost."

(But it's "just" a suggestion <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />)

-On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."

(Hmm . . . now why is that? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />)

-On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this
medication."

(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head colds off those forklifts. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />)

Baby stroller warning:
Remove child before folding.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

A fireplace lighter cautions:
Do not use near fire, flame or sparks.

On a bottle of shampoo for dogs:
Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.

Silly Putty package warning:
Not for use as earplugs.

Shan <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

On a toilet brush:

"Not suitable for personal hygiene" <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

In a motorcycle manual:

"Object moves, when in use" <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Is it just one of my prejudices, or doesn't american companies have to put these kinds of signs on their prodicts to avoid lawcases?

Do not microwave your children (just an example).

Übereil

PS Larian's slow for the moment... DS

I agree Ybs, it is because of american precedent law system. It is more simple to write warning on every microwave owen than have countless courts with moms who baked their kids. Warning places responcibility upon the user.

it isn't just american üb.

if you see medicinal product in europa there is always a long list of counter-recommandment(? english?) for things which have a chance out of 10 000 or 100 000 to happen. E.U norms now.

and there was some law precedent too. Especially about pharmatical produces.

My personal favorite is the "Caution: Hot" labels they put on styrofoam coffee cups.

Yes, it's all about legal liability. For every stupid label on a product there was someone out there actually dumb enough to do the thing and try to sue.

I remember reading a story once where a character was able to get a "Warning - Do not stick in nose" warning printed onto grapes. It was printed right on the grape and on every single one too.

Seriouslly... How do you manage to stick a grape up your nose? And seriouslly... Oh geeze... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ROFL.gif" alt="" />

Übereil

Why can't it be like in Sweden? If you microwave your child you get prison for murder, if you try to stick a grape up your nose, blame yourself for your stupidity etc. Can't you have a law based on common sence?

Übereil

-On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."

(One would hope <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />)

-On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."

(As opposed to... eh... inbetween doors? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />)

-On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."

(O yes, that other use! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />)

-On Sainsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: Contains nuts."

(Gee, thankx for the warning. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />)

on "Consumer labels": great thread Seth! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ROFL.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ROFL.gif" alt="" />

Thank you <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shame.gif" alt="" />

But after reading Barta's french reply to you in the Forum News topic... I think I should have started it in Chat (anything). There are some very silly consumer labels in other languages too.
Ofcourse there are. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

That reminds me: on peanut butter here in sweden it says: MAY contain nuts. (Do I REALLY whant to buy this <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />?)

You cake is already poisonous enough Galadriel <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />

On a Swedish chain saw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (ooooh, there is another way to put it off)

Did you taste it allready??? My cake is addictive! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> When I bake a cake, I can eat just one piece, my hubbie eats everything else!! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Sounds like my family, only that we're more, so I can't have it all <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/puppyeyes.gif" alt="" />. Maybe that's why I'm so skinny <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />...

Übereil

Nono, she can be imprisoned in America also, but the point is not here. The point is when that mother (maybe after prison) goes to that microwave producer and says, - Pay me 15 000 000 $ for all my sufferings because you didn't warned that microwave can harm my kid. Then she goes to court and even has a chance to win. So to prevent that, there are those stupid labels on every owen. Microwave producers secure themselves as cigarettes producers secure themselves writing on every pack that smoking kills etc. Hope this helps.

I saw the same here, only it was on a bag of peanuts...