-On a disposable razor:
Do not use this product during an earthquake.
(I have nothing better to do during an earthquake than shave <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" />)
-On a handgun:
Not recommended for use as a nutcracker.
(Use your rifle <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />)
-On pantyhose:
Not to be used in the commission of a felony.
(Don't forget to bring your ski mask <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" />)
-On a can of Fix-a-Flat:
Not to be used for breast augmentation.
(eh...)
-On a Pentium chip:
If this product exhibits errors, the manufacturer will replace it
for a $2-shipping and a $3-handling charge, for a total of $4.97
(computer logic? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />)
-On a calendar:
Use of term "Sunday" for reference only.
No meteorological warranties express or implied.
(Can we have sundays on the other days? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />)
