Melee gets better later in the game. You need to stop building him as a pure tank and invest stats into damage.
The problem is that Ranged and Magic users can be "less optimized" and still get by, while a melee character needs to be fully optimized to be OP -- otherwise she becomes useless until very late in the game.
For example, a magic user should try to max 2 magic schools so he doesn't stretch himself too thin, but he can invest 1 or 2 skill points in another magic school or even in utility skills like Lockpicking and get by. He can also diversify his Attribute selection, e.g. going +5 INT/+1 SPEED or +3 INT/+2 SPEED and get by.
The melee character needs to be more optimized than that, otherwise she'll die early in combat when she gets focused/CC'd, or risk becoming a meat shield tank that doesn't aggro properly (as in the OP's case).
In other words: If you know how to play melee, she's great. If not, you're f--ed.
