I will dive into all your earlier questions later tomorrow.

In the case of leadership, you want to give it to a caster focused class because:

1: They tend to be in the back so they don't need to be immune to fear.
2: Whatever is alive after your melee focused characters are done can be cc-ed.
3: Casters do not need the exra to hit %.
4: Casters do not really need the extra willpower/bodybuilding, they are at the back so in 99/100 cases the enemies will never reach them.

In the case of lore, no need to use it in combat, use logical reasoning and most enemies are alike and share the same table, know one, know all. No need to put points into that ability in my opinion. Just make sure to give the character that will identify all the items the identify mirror and 2 rings and an amulet that has +lore on it. That is 3 free lore, enough to identify 99/100 items you will find upto level 14. Incase you also have the romantic trait, it gives you another +1 free lore totalling upto Lore 4 which is enough till endgame. By then you swim in the gold and can just choose to let all lore 5 items be identified by vendors or put 1 ability point into lore.

Good luck and have fun!

With kind regards,

Rashar.