Made a account just to voice my frustration with this game as well. Both my friend and I picked this up to play the on the Xbox, as we had played some on the PC(I Kickstarted it). Last night was our first time playing and we played for about 2 hrs with one minor hiccup where his connection failed, but it worked the next try. Tonight however is another story. No amount of trouble shooting could lead us to a solution, restarting xboxs, routers, changing profiles, etc. I was able to connect to a ransoms game, but he could not. We are both playing the digital version of the game.
I also feel that a sometime in December patch that "max fix the issue" is kind of pathetic. I also don't know how you can't recreate this issue as it is obviously not an isolated issue...