As we're going in for rude rhymes, I might as well trot out one of the oldest rhymes I remember from my schooldays:

There was a young lady from Ealing
Who had a peculiar feeling.
So she sat on a chair
with her legs in the air
and widdled all over the ceiling.


Nothing new about that one, but I have a 'historical footnote':

I'd always thought that the rhyme was something of an anatomical impossibility. But a friend who had been hop picking in the south east of England many years ago assured me that was not so!

Apparently, there were two rival camps who turned up each year to pick hops - the Cockneys and the Gypsies. One year somebody challenged everybody else to a pi$$ing competition - highest up the shed wall to be the winner.

The men were looking smug until a Gypsy woman peed clear onto the roof. He did give further details, which I will suppress here.... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />