John invited his Mother over for dinner.
During the meal, his Mother couldn't help
noticing how beautiful John's roommate
Julie was. She had long been suspicious of a
relationship between John and his roommate.

Over the course of the evening, while watching
the two interact, she started to wonder if there
was more between John and the roommate than
meets the eye. Reading his Mom's thoughts,
John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking,
but I assure you, Julie and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Julie came to John and said,
"Ever since your Mother came to dinner, I can't find
the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose
your Mom took it, do you?" and John said, "Well, I
doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure."

John wrote:
"Dear Mother, I'm not saying you did take the
gravy ladle from my house and
I'm not saying you did not take the gravy
ladle but the fact remains that one
has been missing ever since you were
here for dinner. Love, John."

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother.

John's Mother wrote:
"Dear Son, I'm not saying that you "do"
sleep with Julie, and I'm not saying that
you "do not" sleep with Julie but the
fact remains that if she were sleeping
in her own bed, she would have found
the gravy ladle by now, Love Mom."

Drink Up Ye Cider.