Larian Studios Forums General Chat Chat (Anything) did we do jokes already?

Subject: A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an
organization.

Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant and noticed that the
waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a
little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he
also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around saw that all the
staff had spoons in their pockets.

When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?" "Well,
he explained, "The restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp
all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the
spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop
frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel
are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen
and save 15 man-hours per shift."

As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with
his spare. "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of
making an extra trip to get it right now."

I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the
waiter's fly. Looking round, I noticed that all the waiters had the same
string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the
waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right
there?" "Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so
observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save
time in the restroom by tying this string to the tip of our 'you know what'.
That way, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to
wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent."

I asked, "After you get it out, how do you put it back?"

"Well," he whispered, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />