Having read this I think I realized why I'm having trouble and so many other people aren't; I'm trying to play this game like it's normal D&D. I'm not picking up and throwing barrels, using jump a lot, stuff like that, whereas I feel like other people are using the game mechanics as given and are getting their heads around it faster.
This is a problem.
If constantly using the DOS legacy mechanics to get past encounters is the norm then the game is knee-capping it's most valuable asset: The fact that it's Dungeons & Dragons.
I'll be one of the first in line to purchase DOS3.
But I really hope BG3 continues to strive to be D&D.