I play female characters a lot, almost (but not quite) exclusively, in fact. I've quite often had 'the conversation' with other players who look askance at someone playing the opposite gender. In many cases, their experience has been similar to yours - seeing male-played female characters played as bimbos. Such players tend to do the rest of us a great disservice because for all the great and average role-players you see, it's the bad ones that really stick in the mind.
As for hitting on the other PCs; I tend to either play down any sexuality in the character or only role-play flirtation with players I know are comfortable with it. Luckily I have a really good group at present (well, we can't game due to Covid restrictions, but they are still 'my group').
