I'll write something longer on this at some point but I think it helps to separate the: Social and exploring aspects of BG3-- which feel like D&D and hint at BG2. (although like you I want more of BG2 feel -- which will only happen with a 6 person party and more banters outside of camp). Love the light, sneaking, exploring, environmental manipulation and so on. Combat aspects -- which feel like DOS2 with a D&D mod attached. Yes, 5th is a different system but all versions of D&D share the "how do I make it past the armor" aspect. In BG, NWN, ToEE, Solasta, Pathfinder etc you hit the unhittable by using a class based buff. Cast bless, true strike, get a +1 sword, make sure you are proficient in your weapon and suddenly you can hit.
Once they decided "it works . . .but it's no fun at all" they should have brought in a 5th edition fan to explain the system and how hit something instead of deciding to tweak the system.
And they could make missing more interesting with animations. A battle axe hitting armor but not penetrating, ducking, swords clashing, ducking under a slash. Sure "miss" is boring but jumping over the slash of the blade -- that would be great.
