It is kinda funny how unrealistic the response of a character must be to accept half of those 'realistic' companions, murder hobo vampire and weirdly clingy magic bomb most especially. Actually the only game where giving up one of my companions (Astarion) felt just right. Gale's totally carried by his VA.
As for the patch, i'm probably in the minor minority that couldn't care less about gameplay. New playable classes would have been great, but what i really wanted was improvements to the dialogues, camp, quests and stuff like that.
This is a game, it's not about realism. It is enough to play a chaotically (or neutral) evil character to not have problems with Astarion. But then you will have problems with others, which, again, is logical! No one in their right mind would act out the "evil path" by following something "realistic".
I mean, if I saw a stranger who was on a creepy ship and didn't help me??? I would definitely try to pull information. Astarion's reaction isn't as ridiculous as Sebille from DOS.