If we really MUST get a bard (yuck), can we at least get an evil one? A good bard is a contradiction in terms for me. However an infiltrator/spy/manipulator kindof person who gets his ways by social interactions and some bardic magic would make a perfect cunning villain who could betray us in the end. Imagine Eldoth from BG1, but more developed and socially savvy. Come to think of it, I'm kinda surprised Astarion isn't a bard. It would be a better fit with his high elf race because a bard is basically a magical rogue with social skills.
Whats wrong with bards? I think they are a great class in 5e. Also I dont really see how they must be edgy and evil. How are they a contradiction?