The heart of traditional (toxic) masculinity is insecurity. Like watch a Zack Snyder movie, it is all about insecurity (his mostly).
Yes, Wyll is a very good example of that, how he tries to measure up to a standard he will never be able to. I would also argue that his bravado is exactly what traditional masculinity is all about, not about strength but about the appearance of impenetrability (if we want to go that deep into it :D).
About femininity and phallocentrism (which is another word for sexist, and no not all men have to have sexist mindsets).
Being vulnerable is not feminine quality. We are human-beings. We are all exposed and vulnerable. And it is funny that you singled out Jaheira as not feminine enough for you, cause yes, she was the least written to crater to a sort of male fantasy as she was the most complex. She was a person bound by duty to her order and scarred by a tragic loss of her love. While Aerie is the submissive kitten and Viconia is the dominatrix with a heart of gold (and these like are the oldest sexist archetypes).
