If you are going to make all of the single sex romance options like that, make it so all of them are. A player should not be refused to romance whatever companion they want. Also what is weirder is when I played 4 playthroughs as a female character, pretty much all the male companions are open for the romance scene, no matter the number of disapproval I got. So it just seems that right now, as the game plays out, if your a CIS male character, your odds of missing out on the romance (which I understand is seriously limited for companions with a good alignment) are pretty high.
All of the companions are actually "like that" (open to romance) because once you pick one, they all make comments that you can interpret as jealousy - if you so choose. The male characters were interested in your male PC because you made good aligned decisions and they lean good in some way. Astarion being the exception of the three as he is always lowkey interested if as long as you haven't gain too much disapproval with him.
I was able to romance Shadowheart in my Patch 4 run and I wasn't even aiming for her, but I was playing more neutral/pragmatic. I think there's a learning curve in figuring out how these characters tick, and with Shadowheart in particular (who is neutral evil) it's not a bug but a feature that she might approve of saving people one minute and disapprove the next because of different context. And I can see that creating a situation where you have gained approval with her, but just not enough. Typically you need a little over Medium approval to get with a companion on celebration night. What was your approval at?
Limited romance options have always been a thing - where I've had to roll a specific sex or race contrary to what I'd otherwise have wanted in order to play a romance at all (that often times I read a certain way, but the writers clearly did not intend). Playersexual characters are intended to open up that aspect of limited options and perceptions, although with BG3 alignment is
somewhat the limiting factor, but only at first glance. I do think that Shadowheart will be a rewarding romance for a good aligned character in the long run.
