I think something that could do this is convey this during the illithid dream. The tadpole already is buttering us up and trying to seduce us, so I think it'd make sense for it to also have a line saying something about how the others will follow or that we are the best one or something.
That could help give some narrative explanation for the bizarre power dynamics. It comes into play a little late for my tastes though.
I had already lost any investment I had in the characters by the time I got to that point. And folks refraining from messing around with Illithid powers don't even get that dream at all as I understand it.
I think interactions that make sense would be far preferable to an elaborate explanation for why interactions don't make sense. Especially if players aren't going to be privy to that explanation until several hours into the game.
