It's true the first images of the Drow I remember were very much '80s. I more closely associate them with Mötley Crüe or David Bowie, based on the pretty terrible art of that era. So why aren't they bringing up how they can be a way of queer-bashing. They're also a matriarchal society that treats males as less than, so why aren't they seen as an anti-feminist allegory. They also exist in a oppressive theocracy, so why not a screed on fundamentalist Christians or Islamophobia? You can write stories about all these things using the Drow, but don't treat them as real. The Drow will take on any trait the creator wants them to have, and by making this an issue you create the antecedent.
Essentially I view this as creating the problem at the same time as 'solving' it.
Again, it's ok to treat fantasy as separate from reality.
