Isn't all this discussion about characters and writing ultimately somewhat subjective?
I don't believe so, but personally I don't have enough knowledge about writing to properly criticise anyones work.
You might not be able to get your opinions published in some esoteric journal, but I bet you can tell us whether or not you like it... and at the end of the day THAT is what matters.
I do have lots of writing experience, and any time you want readers engaged with characters, the worst thing you can do is tell the reader everything about that character up front. To draw in readers, you need to leave room for mystery. There needs to be some element of that character that entices you. If you reveal everything up front, readers pretty much say, "Oh. Ok. Their story is done. Next."
That's part of why it bothers me so much about Shadowheart and her armor. It screams Shar for those who know anything about Shar, and everything about her says Shar Cleric. Why not start with her trying to deceive you. Have her lie about her goddess and pretend she serves someone else?
