There is nothing necessarily offensive about thinking that gender nonconformity wouldn’t be a thing in Faerun, and folk who believe that it wouldn’t be are free to explain clearly, calmly why this is so.
I can't believe I'm actually going to make this argument, but...
Most cases of people defending the normativity of a rigid gender binary are based on appeals to the notion of "scientific" referents (i.e., sexual dimorphism... i.e., chromosomes or genitalia or hormones). The line of thinking goes that:
-Excluding parthenogenesis, the overwhelming majority of vertebrates reproduce sexually, and heterosexually at that.
-As part of this sexual reproduction, there are two different type-members of species, male and female, who carry on the existence of said species.
-At birth, these types have specific features that develop further and accentuate the typology later on in life.
-These accentuated features of typology convey normative biological and social roles, man and woman.
-Therefore, the gender binary is real and binding. (Though not universal, as there are exceptions; however, this model is the most common).
Regardless of whether or not you believe the line of thinking above, it does not make sense for the fantasy world in Faerun, in which there are multiple
SAPIENT species/races/entities that do not reproduce sexually, do not display dimorphism, and do not have accentuated dimorphic roles later in life. Even if you think gender-nonconformity shouldn't be a thing in real life, the basis for that argument (outside of religion) would
support the notion that gender-nonconformity would be a very prominent thing in Faerun, especially for asexual/amorphous races/species/cultures/entities/societies. I would argue that there are some situations in Faerun where gender-nonconformity might be unavoidable, and what we might consider normatively as gender-nonconforming might be conforming from the perspective of the other individual.
(I can't believe I'm making this argument because I'm not even politically aligned with the "left" on most issues for the most part, and yet I find myself being an ardent defender of this feature)
