In early access (which is not necessarily a guide to how things will work in the full release) a paladin doesn't break their oath if a party member steals or kills a neutral (and it's the killing blow that's significant, paladins can even join in the fight as long as they step back at the last minute).
I've not tried the other actions, but I'd guess that as long as the paladin isn't leading the conversation (and especially if they're not even there) you're probably okay.
Depending on your oath, though, you might have sworn to protect the weak (devotion) or stand against wickedness (ancients) which I'd interpret as including from your own party. I think paladins have to be pretty judgy! Still I don't think the game will make you be, at least yet.