Preeeeetty sure Lae'zel is not going to be a bottom no matter the MC gender... (at least at first)
Actually
there is an option to force her to submit if you romance her after rescuing Halsin, usually she refuses but I know I was successful at least once.
That sounds really unpleasant! Hopefully it's a matter of persuasion to give something different a try rather than "force"?! (I'll admit that party night encounter is the one that I never did try in EA.)