My point was that you only need to take one action to romance her so they lied when they said you can't just do one thing to romance them because I did one thing (the goblin raid) and "romanced" her.
I believe that when they said that, they meant that it wouldn't be a one and done thing like in some games, sure, you can have sex with Minthara after the raid, but she isn't even a companion by then, I assume there's a lot more to the romance with her that we haven't seen. I wouldn't say just having sex once is the ultimate goal.