I don't know what standards people have these days, but from my perspective they're all fine. They're just just their own people with no particular regard for you at the start. With the exception of Lae'zel, they're not mean by my standards, they just don't start as your friends. Which makes them interesting. I read above that Shadowheart was softened which does not surprise me since she comes across a little nondescript.
In any case, my characters are confident enough in themselves that things like Astarion's snootiness don't bother them, and I certainly wouldn't want my possible romance partners to be pushovers. I don't like Wyll because he comes across as being too full of himself. And Gale...well, there's just something that comes across as super-creepy about this guy, as if he was the kind of person who would sell his grandmother into slavery for his next fix. But neither of them are unfriendly. Lae'zel...well, her people see themselves as the master race and she's typical, so yes, not exactly my first choice as a companion, and I'm glad we'll have Karlach as an alternative to occupy the fighter slot in the group, but still Lae'zel is interesting enough to keep around.
So really, I'm very much OK with our possible companions. I experience none of them as "mean" with the exception of Lae'zel, and I take them as they are: people different from my character with their own desires and goals, with their own type of confidence. If someone says something that expresses a certain attitude, they'll get a wry comment and a raised eyebrow in my imagination and that's it. They're at my side when the fighting starts and prove dependable in that every time. That is what counts.
Edit: I find it odd that there is no dwarf, halfling or gnome among the possible companions. I consider that a flaw. It doesn't bother me personally, but I know a lot of people who like them a great deal, and IMO the companions should be somewhat representative of those races of the world appreciated by players.
