@Wormerine, as I said in the Obsidian forum, I completely agree with JES on what he has to say. Unfortunately, DnD has, over the editions, evolved away from being a roleplaying game system to a combat game system, and it is now pretty much all about combat. And contemporary video games using DnD systems echo this evolutuon. My #1 critique of BG3 from Day 1 has been that it is combat and not roleplaying that is central to the game. And in such a game, it is very natural that players will gravitate towards min-maxing, which I fully expect 90% of people playing BG3 to do, because it is the DnD thing to do.
If I were to ever play BG3, a big 'if,' I'd only play it once, and I'd use a mod to increase my party size to six (a non-min-max custom PC and five NPC companions) and also play it exclusively in story mode. I'd do all these things entirely for the purpose of desperately trying to maximize roleplaying while minimizing combat. And I fully expect that such a playthrough of BG3 will be very disappointing and unsatisfying, hence my intense dismay about the game.
It should be noted here that "roleplaying" for me is meaningful and deep roleplaying. So, for me, throwing my shoes at someone or talking to animals or shoving someone off a roof does not count.
That's always my main concern as well. I see combat as a means to add some tension to a story, not an end in itself. Reasonable people of all kind should *always* avoid a lethal fight where that's possible without compromising their goals too much, because that's how everyone but a madman actually behaves. There are three situations where you fight (not counting a brawl): if it's unavoidable, if your goal appears to be worth risking your life, or if you're so powerful compared to the enemy that the outcome appears to not be in question. Real prolonged fights, most of the time, actually are the result of people underestimating the strength of the enemy. I guess we have a rather prominent RL example at the moment.
With that in mind, I prefer games where combat is a highlight and not the rule. There are quite a few persuasion situations in the EA version of BG3, and that includes main story events, so I think you actually *can* play BG3 that way. However, the question is whether you'll get enough xp that way that you can resolve combat situations where they are unavoidable or where it would be appropriate for our characters to start a fight. And because I don't know that, I'll do some min-maxing.
