So reading through your post...
First I get the impression that either you do not often play RPGs or just do not like them. A lot of your criticisms are around RPG related elements of the game.
You referenced that in other games the companions are optional, they are in BG3 as well. You do not need to complete ANY companions quest lines to finish the game. In fact you do not need to use any of the companions at all. In solo play there is a work around to make a full custom party, or play coop with friends.
At the end of the day it sounds to me like BG3 is just not for you, that is okay, no game appeals to everyone. This does not make a game bad, just makes it something you are not enjoying.
As for the title of the post, I have always been an advocate of a philosophy known as the "Patient Gamer". I wait to buy games until they go on sale with full DLCs and expansions. However BG3 was gifted to me so I got it in EA. This is a game that I gladly would pay full price for and have 5 times now because I have bought it as gifts for family and friends.
Again this sounds like BG3 is just not a game you will enjoy. That is okay, go forth and find a game you enjoy...
I have played RPGs, my whole life. Old CRPGS, like Fallout 1 and 2, Baldurs Gate 2 etc. (Baldurs gate 2 was better than Throne of Bhaal. I loved specially the characters.) And all the way to the most modern CRPGs. You have to ask me, more like what crpgs I have not played in last 20 years. That is better question. So just becouse I have some different things to say about BG3 that you guys seem to have, it does not mean that I do not know what I am talking about. So where you happy what happened to the companions in the end of the BG3 game? (Spoiler alert! Just in case!) And the lack of Epilogue in BG3? Example, I think like Fallout: New Vegas is good example or Fallout 1 and 2, how to do epilogue... you know the pictures and some story telling voice what happened is like minium for me to do good enging to complicated CRPGS. Becouse in the end, the first and the most importand need of RPG players is my opinion the feeling of what ever you did, it had impact to the world, characters etc.(Still. I get it. BG3 was hard to game pull of well. Big crpgs and crpgs in general are in my opinion the hardest games to make well.) That said, even Dragon Age 3 DLC did better job in epilogue than BG3 (at least for now), and I dislike Dragon Age 3 more than Dragon Age 1 and 2 and maybe more than BG3, not sure yet. So I do like many CRPG style games, I can be just harsh to things I love the most and I do take it personally, when example potential of the game is not reached and the players did not get what they deserved or was promised.
But you are correct that you do not need to do any of the companion quests in BG3, my issue was not that, but the issue of making the player do the companion quest or Shadowheart attack and try to kill the PC, even I/PC was her friend (you know, very I had very high influence with Shadowheart.) I tested more later, it seem that Wyll will not attack, he just bitch about the demonwoman in prison cell and then what happen with Astarion, I have not tested, becouse I did his companion quest in Act 2. Damn. Man. You have bought the game for 5 friends/family members? Well, you seem to be good friend and family guy, I give you that at least and I agree with you about the wistom of Patient Gamer style. I made the mistake this time, to buy full priced game.
