Ok, so I saw this thread and as an asexual person myself I could not ignore it since it does hit hard, especially when you know that certain companion can have a totally "asexual vibing" choices when they romance Astarion in the first act scene
without having sex with him(!)... it made me so frustrated that custom Tav(or other origins) was bared from that choice and experience just to make that companion somewhat more special... That being said I have some more comments. ^^"
"We can be together without sleeping together, for as long as you need" is right there.
While I agree that it's here and it is good to have it as opposed to not have it entirely... it also have a terrible timing and inconsequential place in the storyline which made it a little bland. Tav should have an option to call [you know what] on Astarion's behaviour in act 1, especially after the scene with insight check passed and they should've been able to tell it to him sooner and then later in that particular scene this choice should be reinforcement of previous statements. That way it would hold even more value for Astarion's character and story; the same way it works for "this is a gift, you know" or "that's what you want, isn't it? To be mine".
Astarion's not a good choice for an ace relationship because he as a character is not ace. Part of his whole deal is reclaiming his body and sexuality for himself.
I agree that it's disappointing that there are no ace options at all though.
I'm sorry to say it, but this is a really wrong thing to write. To the contrary - I feel like a relationship with an asexual might be the one that would let him heal on his own peace. Aces on the black end of spectrum don't feel sexual attraction to others but they can still have a really different attitude towards being involved sexually with others, that have nothing common with sexual orientation. They could form a really healthy and warm relationships with allosexual people. Everything comes to talking things and the needs out and coming to agreements on certain topics. While I see problems that could arise with sex-negative ace in relationship with Astarion, I personally think he would be really happy with sex-positive asexual person. Especially(and I'm quite shocked no one mentioned it before) since he himself says those lines during the act 2 scene:
"I don't think I want you to think of me in terms of sex. I don't know if I want anyone to"
and
"[I want to be seen] As a person? Would that[to be seen as a person, not object of sexualization] be so much to ask?"
This perspective is what he really have in common with most asexual people and what makes him somewhat connected to them... also probably why most people mistake him for ace ironically. That being said while Astarion is not asexual, he is sex-repulsed.
What I always found quite funny about those discussions regarding Astarion is that his actor confirmed that our vampire is pansexual. Do You guys know what pansexuals and asexuals have in common? You might not believe me but like really a loooot aces had a time in their life when they considered themselves pansexual or just thought about it while they searched for their own label. There are like tons of questions on the internet asking "Am I asexual or pansexual?" Those two labels are like two crime partners eating garlic bread in the corner of a room at the party and talking about someone like:
- That one is hot! - Munching on the bread.
- Like a statue of Apollo I would put on my desk and watch all day... - munch also.
- Oh, me too! - munch with more energy, mumbling "yeah, just watching..."He's like the horniest party member (he's constantly flirting with you) aside from Katlach, Lae'Zel and Halsin, personally Gale and Wyll seem more susceptible to being ace due to being more of a slow burn already, sorry but Astartion being ace just seems about out of character as Luke Skywalker being a lonely nephew murdering hermit, personally I would recommend making Halsin ace, since the guy clearly already needs a massive rewrite, from what I've heard so far, or maybe clone Astarion with a DLC companion called Acestarion, I mean being the clone of an already traumatised vampire, just adds an extra layer to angst.
This post made me smile so much, why? Putting aside that You can flirt with people without being sexually interested in them and coming back to the start of my post - because that one companion that have the most asexual vibing interaction with Astarion during his act 1 romance scene is that freakin
Spoiler warning for those who don't want to know more to not read the later part.
Like, seriously, it's ending with them not even doing the thing, but talking the whole night. And no, it's not out of character for Astarion. He is pretty much nasty, mean and the worst person to Karlach in this scene because he don't know what he should do with this situation, but in the end he admits that this would be a nice change. Karlach have a valid reason for saying no to his advances and that is what he understands too, but overall all the lines of dialog for a scene when you don't have a sex with him are here. What Larian could do in custom Tav's and other origin routes is just add that option to choose a logical reason and telling it to Astarion after he yells at You if you say that maybe it's not good idea. There are some arguments I think he would understand because while he is chaotic about things, he is also one of the most reasonable characters paradoxically. Ending that scene like that is the more frustrating when You know that all the lines are there and Karlach have it, but no,Your Tav have to be that person who have to start relation with sex from the start like that without a choice. Like really, player shouldn't have to sleep with him to see the scars, he could've told them about them in that rare moment of first honest conversation he had and Tav still could have the choice to let him drink from them that night. This would not really change later storyline if done correctly, but would made the playtime more enjoyable because of more choices and making Tav more "Yours". I like Karlach, but somehow I feel betrayed by her because of this... This is awful, to emphasize.
