Originally Posted by JandK
Astarion is obviously gay.
I really dislike the playersexual approach. I understand why the choice was made, but gosh if I don't think it hurts the story and the characters' identities.
Thank you.
A plain, straight and simple answer, from someone who can see things from the outside (I can only assume that you're not romancing him) the box.
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I've read through this whole thread and after seeing these two comments I found the real issue. Stereotyping.
"Astarion IS gay end of discussion" has been said in one way or another all over the internet and it's a problem. Declaring Astarion gay shows your asses. Not only can you not wrap your brains around bisexuals existing outside of a binary presentation but you have a some lesbophobia and homophobia to work through too. coding ? pure stereotypes. Making a post about Astarion (quotes from discussions elsewhere but relevant here) "not really being bi/pan", "is gay-coded", and/or "how weird it is to see him be romanced by feminine Tavs", then you should really expect people to get upset and accuse you of being bi/pan phobic because that is literally bi/pan erasure.
It doesn't matter that Astarion is theatrical or that he shares his history about two specific men from his past. That doesn't change the fact that he is canonically pansexual. He flirts with just about everyone in the party, including Shadowheart and Lae'zel, and can potentially sleep with Lae'zel if neither are romanced. He flirts with Tav, regardless of what gender identity they are.
If it's weird for you that people who play as feminine characters would romance Astarion instead of someone more "straight presenting" like Gale, for an example (which is dumb, too, he's also bi/pan), then that sounds more like a personal problem that you should definitely work through.
Please understand basic queer stereotypes and how they are evidently rooted in hetero-normativity and not “queer culture”.
“The tall muscular woman must be a lesbian for no reason other than her physical appearance and the over-dramatic pretty man must be gay because how could he be frivolous and also like women? Only big strong stoic men can be attracted to women.”
You hear how that sounds, right? “But Astarion liked a guy! He’s gay!” Congratulations, you discovered pansexuality.
Accusing Larian of misrepresenting a pansexual character as pansexual is... well, a choice.
I have nothing against gays, queers, lesbians, bi, pans and anything that there is.
What I'm saying is that his past story prior to meeting PC is tailored in a specific way. And it is hard, for me as trad female to imagine that he will be interested in pursuing a relationship with a female, with his back story written the way it is.
Also, I don't mind him liking a guy, as long as there is a woman in the story, which there isn't any. That is the reason. It has EVERYTHING to do with the fact that there no REPRESENTATION of a single woman in his past.
