How does a chicken cross the road?
NT Chicken: Will cross the road in June. No, August.
September for sure.
OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it
was so quiet that nobody noticed.
Win 95 Chicken: You see different colored feathers while
it crosses, but cook it and it still tastes like ... chicken.
Microsoft™ Chicken: It's already on both sides of the
road. And it just bought the road.
OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just
sends a message.
Assembler Chicken: First it builds the road ...
C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.
C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the
road, you'd simply refer to him on the other side.
VB Chicken: USHighways!TheRoad.cross (aChicken)
Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road
and dropped on the other side.
Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a
chicken, the server will download one to the other side. (Of
course, those are chicklets.)
Web Chicken: Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and
just keeps on running.
Gopher Chicken: Tried to run, but got flattened by the
Web chicken.
Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs,
but you can carry it across the road in your pocket !
Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but
if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the
other side fully cooked.
Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed
probabalistically on all sides of the road until you observe it
on the side of your course.
Lotus Chicken: Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the
same way we do!
Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a
chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it to.
Al Gore Chicken: Waiting for completion of NCI (Nation
Chicken-crossing Infrastructure) and will cross as soon as
it's finished, assuming he's re-elected and the Republicans
don't gut the program.
COBOL Chicken:
0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES THEN
PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING


When you find a big kettle of crazy, it's best not to stir it.
--Dilbert cartoon

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