I mean it as the Spawn is the 'good', more humane, sweeter, Wyll-like Astarion who changes for you and Ascendant the guy who is not ashamed of his darkness, embraces his vampiric nature, asks you to join him and takes you for a wild ride. The game simply handled it poorly when it comes to his dock scene. Then again we could make an argument that it shows that Astarion had been right all along - that being a hero is not worth it and no one really cares about him other than Tav. It's a shame the game doesn't allow the players to actually control Tav in that moment, which is rightfully criticised.
Thats the thing though. How many times in real life do relationships where one party tries to change another adult's entire world view actually work? They very seldom do. Astarion going through with the ritual is something that his entire character arc leads up to, he hasn't changed at all. Caring for you doesn't change his world view. I would hate for him to become a Wyll like, that to me is a horrible idea. Nor do I want a more humane and sweeter character. I'm not particularly evil in my playthroughs but neither am I 'sweet' . If I think of Astarion throughout the game, 'Sweet' is not anything that comes to mind either rofl, adorable sometimes yes but not Sweet (and when he is its usually him being manipulative). I very much prefer him as a competent self assured and independent character who loves me and want to be with me in a relationship that is playful and fun rather than someone who needs me and clearly isn't independent. The game itself treats Spawn Astarion as in need of protection (horrible dialogue) good grief why would I want that for him?
