Larian Studios Forums General Chat The Divinity Helpdesk (TDH) :)

very nice, I recently was asked a question like that, cough



Dear Lews, thanks for all the help, I love you r work its so nice! thanks, cough,

Dear Lews/TD Helpdesk,

I was wondering around one day, in Verdistis, and I ran into a couple of, well, how xcan I put it, some girls talking abnout a absaloutly lovely discussion, I lisened and heard all about something intresting, so I went to the innkeeper and asked him what it was about, and soon enough I was in the celler of the store keeper, I asked a friend and he said I should try a special treatment. I asked the barkepper, and he told me to go through a nice door, I walked down, and was in a most peculiar room, and there was my old pall Penumbra, I was wondering, how the HELL DO I GET OUT OF HERE????!

sincerely, damn bastards I'm stuck!



Lews:

dear, Damn Bastards, I'm stuck, you will be in there for a while, but many people ghave felt the, er, charms. Many of the, er, stranger, and nicer of the female race have done us great goods. So rest assured, you will have a good time, after a while of course, I would suggest trying to make it to the nearest healer before jounreying on, for, ah, you might be a little sick after words.


Note: 50 coins have been taken from you account for this, you won't need them, unless you survive, the chance of that...


same questions, from a new helper <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ohh.gif" alt="" />

yesterday I e-mailed cdv for some help , here's the Q&A

A: In heard about a new patch for divinity, were can i download it?
A: there is a patch 1.34 still in progres. it will be released in the next couple of mounths.

-> next email:
Q: but isn't this patch , founded at this link , at the website of the larians?
A: thank you for poining this out! we didn't knew this site existed. we will check this matter out

ough... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ouch.gif" alt="" />

Seriously? *disbelief*
I don't really like CDV (mainly for the lack of DD support) but I simply cannot believe it! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/memad.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

'nuf said.

euh..
it was a joke! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />
<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

D'oh! You made it too believable!

Q: I keep trading with the same merchant, but he never gives me any discounts on goods.
A: It doesn't work at the corner store. Stop confusing games with reality!

Q: I can't find a bow strong enough to kill the Arachnotrons.
A: Stop confusing games with games! Get a life!

*Pokes the Bean between the ribs with a pencil* How do you like that, Joker?!
;D

Ha-Ha!! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

a passage from Lord of the rings in the dwarven mines (fight scene with earthmen(?) )

"but when DATD put the pensil in bean's chest, wonders revealet a mithril penselsharpener hidden on my chest, and soo survived the attack,
and charpened the pensil to oblivian.
time for some jokes said our hero,and i drank a whole glas of milk.
in the meanwhile DATD bought a whole box of pensils (to be continued? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />)

-> At the cdv helpdesk
Q: you guys at cdv are all bastards! not knowin the larians have a website etc...
A: huh? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />, but we do know that.
Q: liars!!!!!

Q: i have a normal sword worth about 40000 gold. but it has no good stats at all. what is this?
A: you are one of the lucky ones. you found the legendary sword of "uselesness". keep it.
the secrets of this sword will reveile itselve when you play the game further one. tip: use it also in the wastelands!

Q: i'm a male survivor i found this cellar with the girls and the boys offerin "you-know-what" to me.
wich one do i have to take?
A: if you want the FULL experience as a survivor, take the first male. he's a specialist in backstabbin! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Q: I am in the catacombs underneath the first village, and i am out of potions, I have killed all the enemies there are here.
The only thing left are 4 tombs, what should i do?
Return to town to get potions or..?

A: Open the tombs. As reward for killing all the baddies they are filled with tresures and potions, besidedes, mardenius sanity will automaticly be restored <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/badsmile2.gif" alt="" />

*influenced by jvb's post*
Q: I am level 7 and just restored Mordanious's sanity. While running towards the wilderness I got attacked by a boar so I am badly wounded. HELP! What should I do?

A: You should go straight to the orc camp. Just keep slashing orcs untill you reach the next level. Then you'll get healed to maximum!

Q: help, i played <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/div.gif" alt="" /> for houres strait ahead. i even forgot my wife's birthday while playing this marvelous game.
and NOW she doesn't say anny thing annymore to me!!
A: MMM .. there is a problem with her soundcard i think. did you instill the latest drivers?

Q: thanks i installed the latest drivers . she can talk again, but i only her swearing words out of her!!!
A: it seems that your wifes hardware isn't compadible with your system. you better find another model ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

LOL!
Bean, that's simply amazing!

Variation:
A:Upgrade your CPU, make a BIOS-Flash, increase your memory = she's too highclassed for you <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> - you 486er loser <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />


Q.: Which skills are broken?
A.: None of course, you're just out of luck.
Q.: Huh?
A.: It's simple - at the beginning of the game we've installed a secret pre-program randoming your luck
Q.: Yew, and is there an editor for this?
A.: Yes, but this one only generates if you're lucky enough to edit our pre-program
Q.: But that's bloody unfair!
A.: "Where stands it written that I have to be fair?"

Q.: Corinna died - any suggestions?
A.: Find Josie, she'll help
Q.: Ok, done, but I keep on dying <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif" alt="" />
A.: That's the solution <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />
Q.: Huh?
A.: You're both dead <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />

Q.: How do I mix potions?
A.: You have to wait until midnight, then let your char encircle the herb patch, if your mouse was not exact = no potion
Q.: Isn't this a bit complicated?
A.: Nope, we believe in intelligent gamers <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

Yet another Variation:
A:Upgrade your floppy drive, make a bootable BIOS-"hot"Flash, increase your lack of memory = she's too "overclocked" for you , Win XP is NOT compatible with 8088 and DOS 3. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> You may need to make a better "image" of your disc...

Q: I'm stuck in the game. I think I broke a few quests. Help.
A: Have you tried the forum?

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />

Q: I'm playing dev div, and no one comes to talk to me, i have to start all the conversations myself, and..

A: Get a life!

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

A: you need to upgrade your "hardware" <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> to be more compatible with her "software". make sure you have a big "computer" with lots of power and, um, stamina... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

A on A:
But then the software crashes. I get the message it has a "headache" or something.
<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />