I STRONGLY disagree with this sentiment in regard to the Shadowheart romance at least. It’s not “pushing buttons until sex,” come on. What I’ve found is that most things in the game (barring lacking aspects of Act 3) are deeper and more satisfactory the more effort you invest in them. There are ways to get the most out of a romance, and out of a character’s story, that is not just “in my roleplaying head” and it’s WAYYYY more meaningful than pressing buttons until sex. I make sure to do Shadowheart’s secret interactions throughout the game, which are very sweet, and I check in with all of my companions for their reactions regularly. You get out of it what you put into it.
Sure, you can have a lot of nice interactions with companions (even without romancing them), but these events are mostly self-contained and restricted to the narrow "romance storyline". They have no effect on the main story.
For example, you could be in a "blossoming relationship" with Shadowheart, but when the moment comes for her to decide what to do with Nightsong and you dare (!) to suggest that killing that imprisoned girl may not be the best idea, she will throw the same 30 dice roll challenge at you. Your supposed closeness to her does not make a difference. The game just ignores romance status in many cases where it should count. At least for me, it ruins the immersion.