The only way you can keep the romance status is to tell Astarion that you care about him without any reservations. Especially in the Post-Araj scene this is jarring, since in this version his confession that he only used you, comes without remorse, worse he is making fun of you for having been so easy. If you keep the whole "circle of abuse" narrative in mind, this would have been the perfect moment to show how his exploitative behaviour while understandable, is also harmful and very much not ok. Yet the PC is not allowed to have conflicting feelings, to be torn between being in love with Astarion but also feeling hurt by him, to maybe even feel disgusted by themselves for involuntarily having added to Astarion's discomfort.
I take this confession a little more lightly. This whole thing started out as a fling. Everybody's trying to seduce Tav in one way or another. Not today, not tomorrow, everyone could grow tentacles. As soon as Ast starts to sense something else, he informs the player that, "here's the thing...(further down the line)". Without using metagaming or knowing the backstory, most Tavs agreed to his offer of a night with the calculation of "why not or well finally, what, fed you for nothing", not out of deep feelings, no matter how charming he was. So, the fact that Ast is worried that he's so bad that he decided to seduce you to help him, but realized that you're awesome and fell in love.... well, it's like a teen movie from the '2000s where the prince of the school falls in love with the nerd for fun, but then for real. (Ha-ha, pardon the comparison).
And scolding him for it is questionable, in my opinion. You already forgive him, saying, "I also want to something real.". Saying him, well you are certainly a fruit and hurt me, but I forgive, to someone who has problems with trust and manipulation, well...he can further just not say then truthful, but hurtful things to you, so as not to offend and further pretend that all is well. But that's my opinion and vision.))))). But I agree that the scene with Yugir is better than the scene with Araj and less selfish.
Originally Posted by Anska
There is also the issue that the two scenes in act 2 have, to me at least, vastly different outcomes: The post-Araj scene is, as Zayir already mentioned, selfish. Astarion is moved that someone is seeing him as more than an object to be used, but he does not feel the need to return the favour. In this scene "this is nice" means "It is nice to be cared for". The post-Yurgir scene starts with Astarion's confession, here he feels bad for having wronged you and expresses his desire to figure out what a real relationship might look like. "This is nice" in this context means the none-physical relationship. Moving forward, both scenes are treated as the same, it does not make a difference which one you got.
I believe that these scenes should both exist. And the scene with Araj should not open up further romance, but only give information about how Astarion sees himself, and the player can help him or validate his vision by ordering a bite. As far as I know, and I wrote about this in another thread, so far, getting the Yugir scene still allows us bite to make the merchant and we get the potion, without any consequences for Astarion's romance. It's a shame.
Originally Posted by Anska
Worse yet, while both routes continue with a dry-spell, none-sexual intimacy is never actually explored. Which is a shame really. I think it could have been extremely rewarding if how Astarion approaches the ritual, would change depending on whether he remained largely selfish (Araj-route) or tries to have "something real" with the PC (Yurgir-route).
