Plenty of artist who just shared the "fantasy" in their songs of doing illegal things turns out they actual did them, themselves. People care more about the stage character and how much they like them then the crimes the commit or the evidence. Same for anyone what writes a book and later is found to have committed crime . The sort of media you like does indeed say a lot about you. (...) Their are reason why certain forms of media are illegal or censored because its well known to have a negative effect.
Might be in some cases. But is this the majority? Is the majority of people, writing a book about crimes, commiting or wishing to commit crimes? Media (fiction), consumed by adults, doesn't have a negative effect on them per se. This can of course occur to certain people, a few, who have a genetic predisposition to it. Ted Bundy was claiming violent porn was the reason for his crimes, do you believe him? Do you think media had a negative effect on him? Do you think, without consuming violent porn, he wouldn't have murdered?
Violent porn for example, is a case, which may tell things about you, sure, but also this, it doesn't mean you're going to commit crimes or wish this to be real. It also may depend on things like if the person consumes real violent porn (watching real crimes/r*pes) or fictional violent porn, and in fictional violent porn there are also a lot of shades and tastes. It's not just black and white. It's not possible to lump together people who consume media or artists, who create art, with criminals.
Well, to come back to the topic: Astarion cannot be compared to real life persons, he does feel empathy and guilt, and players do like this about him. If he wouldn't have the humanity-side in him, the majority of people wouldn't like him. He is a fictional character with unrealistic combined personality traits (good and bad ones). It's just impossible to compare him with a real life person or a real life personality, and so it is impossible to say people, liking this fictional character, would like or how you called it "lusting after" real life serial killers or tolerating crimes. Or something like that, if this is, what you're trying to say.
I think Larian wanted to create a funny and enjoyable fictional villain / evil companion (with good and bad traits) and they did quite good with him due to his popularity. I agree with you, that Astarion is quite evil in some of his actions and it's not possible to call him out so much. But that's what seems to be intended. Not every taste can be met.
