To a degree, I think we all feel this, but some people can't really rationalise what they're seeing. Nor describe what they're feeling, really. People can't reason themselves out of positions they didn't reason themselves into, it's naked emotion. It's less about being a shared toy than: something exists, it makes them feel bad, they want it gone. Controlling someone else's play style by necessity is a a casuality of having that need met.
Man, I really LOVE when you are psychoanalyzing all of us previous posters like you think you know shit. Putting us all neatly in our little boxes with lables on.
