I agree that the current skill checks are not done well. What actually annoys me most is waiting for that damned die to roll - and if you click space to make that wait time go away you never know if you failed or not. Infuriating.
But, especially with Nettie, there's another view of the situation. Even if you fail the dialogue checks, that is not a total failure of the situation. You still have 3 or more ways to solve it, and the in the end the game continues the same no matter which you choose - the only thing that changes is how much loot or xp you gain from it. And the peaceful solution, through dialogue, is as always the worst outcome here.
- You can cook your own cure in the cauldron outside
- You can pickpocked the cure.
- You can simply kill her, nobody cares. Then loot her room. Nobody knows, nobody cares.
- Just die and ressurect - didn't actually try this, guess it might work ?
So in then, it's all the same.
I am not sure if there are any dialogue checks which have a really hige difference in the outcome. The one I can think of is the outcome after the 'evil ending party'.
If you convince the drow priestess to help you, she sends to the overland route - if you fail and kill her I think you might have to go through the underdark ?
Yep pretty much, but this is encounter has quite a few issues. Personally I never thought of picking the cure from her. I also never noticed there being a cauldron. I did not want to kill her, so the persuasion check was the only choice. The issue is that there are multiple ways to the same result, which is nice, but the game rarely tells you anything or gives you hints what to do. You just fail a skillcheck and therefore deduce you are at a disadvantage. Other games somehow solved this better. I am generally for skillchecks, but I somehow feel cheated when I fail, especially when I do not precisely know the bonuses or mali applied and get the feeling I am missing out on content.
Also the skillchecks do not really tell you or hint at you, what might happen if you fail the check and what the further consequences are. In the Fallout franchise, which makes heavy use of skillchecks, it is usually extra information, a little help, extra money, or a peaceful solution to a potential conflict (or the other way around). All pretty clear, that is why fails are no real issue.
In BG3 I intimidate someone, for no clear reason and with random consequence. So I want to pass every check and see what is behind it. For example there is this frog with a medium skillcheck. I fail it attacks. I pass the check and interact further it attacks. Thousand questions arise and I am left totally puzzled.