As the older members already know, I'm a newbie in this internet world - and I have wondered very often, why the sentence "get a life" is used so often in this virtual world and very seldom meant in a friendly way.

1.Well, what is this "life I/you/others should get"?
2.What does it involve?
3.What does it exclude?
4.What is your personal definition of a "life to get"?
5.Why is a "life" (spending time on the internet) not a "life" - and if it is not a "life", what is it then?

Please, try to stick to the questions I posted - I really want to understand. Refrain from spamming if you can - I've tried very often to understand the meaning - up to now: in vain.
Kiya

people who say such things really have no "lives" of their own..
And I am serious in this matter, people who have good lives, and are always happy, like me <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shame.gif" alt="" /> never say such things.

And if people say such things to me, I just laugh at them, knowing I am better than that.

1: with a life they mean a life outside computers, going outside in this terrible weather and such..
Strange : they say such things mostally when behind computers themselves..

2: it involves much of friends, attention from girls etc etc etc..

3: it encludes liking to game, or spending time behind the pc, reffraining yourself from contact with the outside world.

4: don't know exactly what you mean, srry <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shame.gif" alt="" />

5: IMHO, it is as much a life as everything else, it is what you choose to do, and what you like..
Who is to say things about it not being a life..

My Humble Opinion:

In a practical sense, it's really a meaningless phrase used mainly for the emotional reaction it evokes. Could be any of:

- a classic "put down" from any thoughtless, arrogant, self-satisfied person to anyone else who doesn't fit in with their particular definition of "smart" or "cool";

- an indication of impatience, or gesture of dismissal (a way of saying "I can't be bothered with you")

- the feeling of a generalist toward a specialist of any sort, especially in a computer context... (possibly an element of envy involved?)

- a flippant phrase used between good friends who are just kidding around... and are perhaps just a tiny bit anxious deep down inside that what they are interested in (or obsessed with) isn't considered quite "normal" ("normal" being another nasty word that should be used with extreme caution <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />!);

- a phrase used by someone in a self-deprecating manner ("I really need to get a life".), which may just mean that they are perhaps a bit unhappy with the way their social life is going at the moment...

1 - I don't know

2 - I don't know

3 - I don't know

4 - Real life - sucess in all what you do(well - you have to try). I'm not saying you'll get it.

5 - Isn't a real life, is a virtual life - you can't live with ilusions of what don't exist or happens in the world - the internet is a fountain of information is a way of conection to other people what you can talk about anything, but you hide your real personality cause this "world" let you do that very well, and is almost impossible you have real real emotions with it, you can't touch or hug a person using a computer - people needs people - the machine hide what you are, you can't dance with other person using a computer, you are limited by what the machine offer. It's a big ilusion of data and a lot of aplications what hide what is really happening - is a big interpretation of protocols and etc. I prefer to share all i have with a person what i love than have a lot of machines. The machine is a way to escape from the reality of the world(what sometimes isn't a good reality or isn't the reality what you want). Of course nothing stop you to do what you want, but... is your own decision.

and 6 - i'm not saying to you stop to use machines, cause it's cool yet.

my girls always used to tell me to "get a life" ,in a friendly sort of way.. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
so my reply to them for that everytime was..... "i've already got a life,.....and your in it".

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />
i really don't know why ppl say it......maybe they're jealous of your life and want to put you down...or maybe theyre joking with you, or maybe their priorities do not match with yours, so THEY feel like YOU don't have a life?? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" /> oooooooh thats is surely deep!! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ouch.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kitty.gif" alt="" />

Careful Jurak that little orc brain my overload LOL <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/badsmile2.gif" alt="" />

My classic response to this is usually something along the lines of, "I've got one mate, and its better than yours...."
<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />

Poor little Jurak's brain... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Ah ! - A philosophical discussion ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> I love that. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

1.Well, what is this "life I/you/others should get"?
2.What does it involve?
3.What does it exclude?
4.What is your personal definition of a "life to get"?
5.Why is a "life" (spending time on the internet) not a "life" - and if it is not a "life", what is it then?

I cannot stick to exactly all of the points, pleaee forgive me. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> When I'm beginning to write, everything becomes an article on something. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> I don't like to innterupt "the flow". <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

So, my thoughts :

Depends on the point of view of the one who says it. "hanging in a virtual room" (crude description for Internet <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> ) might be considered "inferior" by some people.

I think that "being online" and especially "chatting" is considered "non-productive" by some people.

That reminds me of the view many men have towards "chatting" , "gossip" and communication in general : It's not productive. You don't create things with it, so it's basically inferior to "productive" works.

The element of the exchange of information is often heavily ignored, because that's a thing the people didn't need for a long time. A farmer doesn't need that - he only needs to know when to seed and to harvest.

In recent times, the view has shifted a bit, butr this is still far from being well considered : We live in a society (at least in the so-called "Western World" , no matter how rude this term might in the effect be) that is more and more built upon the exchange of information - like the shift from a productive economy (farmers) to a economy rather based upon services (Dienstleistungsgesellschaft).

So "get yourself a life" basically means (in my theory) that you should a) shut up (stop chatting), b) stop being online all of the time, but rather c) "do something productive".

Artists have this problem, too : They all create wonderful works everyone adores, but no-one would say they do "productice works" like a smith, a farmer, a miner and so on.

Some people listening to guitar music (Heavy Metal and relatives) say that they listen to that, because it's "hand made". The same reason can be applied to orchestras, too, though.


Digging deeper, it might be a thing of "hands vs. mind". It reminds me of the DDR, the "other German country", so to say, which wanted to be a "Arbeiter und Bauern-Staat" (country for workers and farmers). People who worked with their minds were considered inferior to them, as far as I know, at least in the socialistic theory (so to say).


In the asian country Cambodia (right spelled ?) the terror regime of Pol Pot went even some steps further on : I've heard the term "Steinzeitkommunismus" ("stone-age communism") which is said to be a state of being they wanted : People only working with their hands, for their living, everyone being equal towards others, no mond-workers allowed. Rumor says that people who even had glasses were punished to work in camps. Everyone knows the infamous "Killing Fields" .


I think that is the most deepest point I can reach in this analysis : the difference of "working by mind" compared to "working by hand".

That's as deep as I can get. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

And of course, that'y my very own theory. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

Alrik.

I have noticed that there are two ways of saying that. When somebody bothers us and we are mad so we tell him that he should mind his own business and stop spending time with us bothering us.

And there is an other way, when we want to say to someone that he should feel bad because his life is empty and he is dealing with crap and that he has nothing important in it.

I have noticed that it is used more offten in the net and I can think only one reason : People who like computers are usually people that spend many hours in front of them. There are people that in some way after being so many hours in front of a screen kind of loose reality. Their life becomes the screen and the mouse. I think that is because there is much lonliness in this world after all. Sometimes it is in our hands to stop be lonely and sometimes it is not. Or at least we think so. So sometimes this expresion is used for people that spend many hours in front of a pc loosing some of the good things that life has to offer. I once told that expresion to a friend of mine but not in a bad way. It was said out of love and care because he refused to go out and have some fun, he was trying to find a girl from the net and generaly could not see people around him that loved him and cared about him and they were in flesh and blood right in front of him. So I told him "You should get a life" in a very calm and sweet way. In some cases I believe it is not important what you say but the way you say it. So he looked at me like he have not seen me for a long time and said "What did you say?" I repeated explaining to him that there is a whole wide world outside waiting for us. To cry, to laugh and live.

We talked for many hours and then we went for some drinks. I told my friend how much I have missed the times we have spend together and all that fun we had in the past (note : he was only a friend of mine for 11 years. Not a lover).
Eventually we had a great time this night. And we promised to repeat that next Saturday. And we did. Now he is getting married. And he found his girl not from the net <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

I don't know if this huge post answers any of your questions Kiya. I hope it does (cause I had a hard time writing it) but in conclusion I think that these words sometimes mean good and sometimes mean bad. Like the most things in this life in order to keep balance.

Ok I know I am writing crap. Could someone please stop me?

stop you! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> get a life will ya! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

jus kiddin' <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kissyou.gif" alt="" />

I'll try to explain what I think of the following two things: what people mean with it and why they say it.

[edit]In this post I'm only talking about the "Geez, get a life, (wo)man" kind of "get a life", if you know what I mean <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

With "life", I think most people mean "real life interaction".

(Add "I think" to every sentence following next -- This is not something scientifically proved <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />, it's just what I think <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> )

Most people live for relations. In fact, most people are obsessed with relations: I could bring it down to Freud's favorite subject, but I don't think I need to, to have you agree that most people can't be on their own for a long time, without starting to feel tired, sad and/or lonely.
When I say most people live for relations, I mean both intimite relations and "mere" friendship. Most people feel bad when they don't have a partner. And you don't experience hugs, kisses... (and the usual consequence of those <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> ) over the Internet.
As for the friendship (and partner as well, of course): relations over the Internet are not valued as highly because there is no physical contact. We're animals, and until telephones and Internet etc showed up, contact meant actually being next to eachother and communicate. Even shake hands or give eachother a how-do-you-do kiss.
With physical contact I also mean body language: very important - but missing when over the Internet - aspect of communication. It's like we're only communicating half - it's not our "natural" way of interaction.
When someone tells you to "get a life", it's usually because you've done or said something that could indicate and is interpreted by that someone, that you've been without that kind of contact for too long. It doesn't even have to "seem" that long, any small indication will make us assume what we want: we live in a time where we like to exaggerate - and more importantly, don't we just love preconceptions? When we say to someone "get a life" we're also hoping (s)he's actually someone who'se spent too much time on his/her own: that would make us less "nerdy" than that person, and don't we all love to be "better" than the rest?
By stating this I could come across pretty biased myself, but let me add I'm not saying it's always the same reason for why someone says "get a life". But I think it's a very common reason and a valid explanation in many cases.

Well, I think, anyway <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

So far I think it's a consensus that there are at least three reasons for telling someone to "get a life". 1) you care for them and you see them not taking care of themselves or 2) you think that you know exactly how they should be living their lives and that's your way because you're so much smarter then they are and want to play "God" or 3) you're just being spiteful and you know that everyone has insecurities about who and what they are - especially when they are extremely passionate about something.

@Alrik: I have my doubts. It's often said by youngsters, teenagers often, to "get a life", and they're often the kind that go out and get drunk or high every other night. You know, the kind of people that do lots of things, but little productive...
In some cases you're possibly still right though, but when I see someone like described above tell someone to "get a life", I really don't think (s)he's talking about productivity (unless you consider "that other kind of productivity" as productivity <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> , but then we're not talking about blacksmiths and farmers anymore, are we <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> )

The phrase "get a life" implies the current absence of "a life".

The very indirection of the phrase (by implication) indicates that the speaker is acting in a passive-aggressive manner. Whether the speaker's intention is humor, disdain, challenge, or rhetorical, this form of indirect attack is designed to be confusing to the target of the comment.

Put yourself in the target's shoes. You hear someone say to you: "get a life." You hear the words, and know the definition of each of them because you have memorized the dictionary. However, it is obvious to you that there is a hidden meaning behind the phrase. Your own personality, mindset, and attitude will be likely to bias your interpretation of the phrase and subjective evaluation of the hidden meaning.

Meanwhile, the speaker has seized that moment to consciously choose to throw you off balance with the comment. Why? Was the speaker losing the battle of wits and needed to jockey for a better wrestling position? Was the speaker trying to escalate a situation into a confrontation by throwing the first punch? Was the speaker acting or reacting out of habit, without understanding why that behavior exists in his or her persona/psyche? Was the speaker attempting to ingratiate himself/herself to you by acting a little too intimately for the situation?

Bottom line: The phrase "get a life" is an attack of some sort. The attacker knows it is an attack. The attacker also knows that the target can not possibly "know" exactly the hidden meaning behind the phrase.

It may not the the first punch in a confrontation, but it is a punch nonetheless. Friendly or otherwise.

get a life: "your a computer nerd with no social life!" "I don't admit it but, I myself have none either and act like I have this really interesting social life etc etc"

Hmmmm.... You know, it's not always an attack though... When I was defending that abstract riddle in the riddle thread and looked at the amount of letters I had just typed, I though by myself "Geez, Kej, get a life", and I meant it in a very considerate way <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

what a life ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Kiya you are the best <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Don't know anyone who could actually get so many and such long responses on a philosophical subject like "Get a Life", but here's another " I will be there in a hurry" I mean honestly have you ever seen anyone arriving in a 'hurry' and if you did what did it look like ? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

Another theory... People often say "Life's a bitch". So, when they say "get a life", maybe they mean..... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Never mind <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

... get a dog?

A life on the internet is a life . You still have to breath and to eat and to sleep when you're spending all your time on the internet so you're still alive wich means that you have a life no ? It is just another way of being alive and I can understand that some people prefer the savety of the internet than our outdoor world . I would be concerned if I had friend who'd only a life on the internet and I gess I would advice him to get a life but more because I would be afraid to loose his as friend because he is closed up from the outdoor world (and me) then meaning it in a negative way . On the other had If I had an internet friend who changed his lifestyle and didn't spend much time online anymore I would advice him to get his 'internetlife' again because I didn't want to miss him either .

For all other people I wouldn't have any advice because it wouldn't touch me a lot if they have a 'real' life or an 'Internet' life so I let them life their lives likes they feel most comfortable with . And because my own way of living isn't perfect I am not able to tell someone what a perfect life is . (I think that nobody can say what a 'perfect'life would be )


Kej >> You really should get a life then *gg* If you're even talking about good old Freud . <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />

Ps : This is not an attack but an advice from a freaky friend <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/offtopic.gif" alt="" /> Can a Bitch also be male or is a Bitch always female ?

only if the male is less than a male and has no life! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Bitch is a female dog ("teef", in het Nederlands). Of course, people rarely think of the actual meaning when they use that word.
The male version is, strangely not "you husband of a bitch!" but "You son of a bitch!" <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />



I know. And you know what I know <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

[quote
<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/offtopic.gif" alt="" /> Can a Bitch also be male or is a Bitch always female ?
[/quote]

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/offtopic.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> It works for both now. It can also be an affectionate term (be very careful how you say it though <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" />)
[color:"green"]*******************************************[/color]


You know even if you are frustrated with yourself and you say "Self - get a life!" It's an attack of sorts - you're actually trying to shake yourself up just a wee bit.

My 2 cents worth - anytime you let yourself become obsessed over anything so much that you can only eat, sleep, think about, do that thing (almost exclusively) then you need to be concerned about your mental health and well being. We all need balance in our lives. Physically we need sun & exercise, emotionally we need people - that means touching and hugging and being there, intellectually we need stimulus. But the healthiest life is balanced.

Everyone has a different idea on what "getting a life" means: if you love music then if you tell someone to "get a life" you mean they need more music in their lives; If you're a dancer - more dancing; if you're a gardener or a farmer (because you want to be) it's having your hands in soil and watching things grow; an athlete .....

Of course, if someone is obsessed with these things we're back to square one - They need to "get a life"! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/offtopic.gif" alt="" /> Hey!! DQ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wave.gif" alt="" /> how the heck are you? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/offtopic.gif" alt="" />

i had a life once......but i didn't like it .....

so i changed it and lost it.......
and now......
i'm looking for a new life! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/disagree.gif" alt="" />

half my life is here and the other half is where?

"It's an attack of sorts"
---------

... or a challenge (could be either destructive or constructive), or an internal pondering and weighing of priorities...

Challenge is a much friendlier word than attact <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/offtopic.gif" alt="" /> Jurak - I'm searching for a new life again too and still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. Haven't got a clue! And you?

Woweee! Just came back and saw all your responses - I'm totally delighted <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kissyou.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/party.gif" alt="" /> - sooo much to read and think about. Thank you all very very much for sharing your thoughts and opinions.

@Luc: Nope, don't you dare to write that your post was crap => it's not <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/exclamation.gif" alt="" /> I appreciate it very much that you went through all that trouble and wrote such an eloquent post.

I will need a few days to sort everything out in my head - and this time I might understand the sense of this sentence, be it an attack, a teaser or out of concern - because I always considered these words to be important, Why? Because they come so very very often <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> - I have read them so very often.

Toffees for all of you

Kiya <running happily back into her lair with precious info titbits in her hands>

glad we could be of help <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Did all we could do <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shame.gif" alt="" />

Hm, I'm also kind of impressed by all these replies ... such a huge variety of answers ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" />

Back to topic : From time to time, my body or mind or whatever tells me "that's enough !" and it drives me to go out. I mean, it's like as if my body or mind said to me : "Go, get a life !" in the meanong "go, get out into Nature ! Do a walk ! get into (more or less) physical contact with others !".


Then, I just must obey. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />


That's how I try to keep balance : my "inner voice" "rings" when it's time to go out again. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> (Buying food and some other things, walking through woods ... such things. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> )

i love toffee....it gets in my teeth! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
thx! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wave.gif" alt="" />


No clue......what i'm a gonna do
but i'm not blue <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/puppyeyes.gif" alt="" />
cuz i got all of you! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wave.gif" alt="" />

but i too....
enjoyed reading this interesting
out of nowhere
to popular thread! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

actually i DO have a little life left,
and i'm going back to it right now...
...thx to Kiya and the map of ionas dungeon... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />


..c-ya in a while! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wave.gif" alt="" />

Get a wife!!

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kitty.gif" alt="" />

Is that the alternative to "Get a life"? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

Nah, Im just in a marrying mood <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kitty.gif" alt="" />

I think the term Get a Life refers to.

Go do something else, unlike me, i'm boring, you should go do something fun.


or as sarcastic, as in all someone does is one thing, and they should do something new.

Here I am, a little late, with what I think of the phrase.

It's generally said to someone who seems to be focused too much on one thing, hobby, person, etc.. The person saying "get a life" usually means it with a bit of disdain or possibly concern, and probably feels like the person isn't really living if they're limited to one particular thing and not out experiencing new and different things.
Suffering from depression, it's something I've heard a lot, from people who probably meant well, but it generally does no good.

Ah, sorted everything out and tried to put it into a short sentence by searching my inner memory boxes:

"Get a life"-translation =>

[color:"yellow"]Be as I want you to be, be not yourself
Fill my needs not yours[/color]

[color:"orange"] Edit: Am I on the right track? [/color]
These are sentences used in psychology, showing a generalised view of how people deal with each other when they are not clear to oneself/others about needs, wishes and appellations. Yes, BeeGee, I think it's passive aggressive - Rince, it's "normative" (yeah, a typical killer word) - even if meant in concern. And the "power, infliction" of this sentence lies indeed more in the nonverbal sector than in the sentence itself.

I just need one tiny puzzle piece => where does this sentence come from? Is it an everyday term in English/American language and was mainly adapted for the internet world or was it "created" specially for this world?

Again, thanks to all - and keep on rolling in with your views <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" />
Kiya

Kiya thnx for your words... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shame.gif" alt="" />

And for the toffees <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

1.Well, what is this "life I/you/others should get"?
2.What does it involve?
3.What does it exclude?
4.What is your personal definition of a "life to get"?
5.Why is a "life" (spending time on the internet) not a "life" - and if it is not a "life", what is it then?

1. life to me is a gift from my creator. life that i & everyone should have is to be happy & meaningful & with purpose. ok ok ok, that's very vague but as we grow older we learn more about ourselves & therefore our needs & goals & purpose. to live is the answer to the question: what is life? go figure that one out. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

2. physically it means being alive (breath, grow, multiply, decay, die). mentally thoughts & manners & reasonings get deeper therefore expansion of the mind & its capabilities. emotionally growth & empathy & sensitivity & response. spiritually connecting & direction & purpose & drive.

3. experience & choice will determine the exclusions.

4. 'live fully' is another term for it? be all that u can be, finding my true purpose (thoughts & acts) & fulfilling it. therefore becoming one's true self. like a knife truly acting as one therefore becoming a true knife in design, purpose & implementation.

5. life is up to each person's perception & ideals. so definitely 'internet' life is always perceived as imperfect & therefore anyone who lives that may get such words in their faces; get a life. why imperfect? no real interaction, meaning no voice, no 'mano a mano' (man to man, face to face), it really lacks the depth & intimacy that real life interaction can provide. now that is true, at least to me. but it doesn't mean there is no life. life is lived for as long as u know that u are alive. life i guess is more of being aware of being who u are & living it, with it, change it, make it.

this discussion can go on & on & on .... . it all comes down to each person's perception i guess. & the word 'life' is too crude & general for something so deep & wide as the universe. so who's to say that life's limited to small electrical impulses? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Regarding origins of the phrase, here are some theories (all cribbed from the internet, of course <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" /> ) :

What is the origin of "get a life"?
(Etymology)

...getting a life might have originally had something to do with getting another life as in the video games when your little guys got knocked off. I used to hear kids asking how many lives the other guy had left, etc. I'll 'get a life' if I ... So the expression or words 'get a life' could have fist appeared, in the 80's, but not quite with its present connotations.

It may next (or concurrently) have begun to be used by computer geeks who would spend hours on end at their terminals, and their PC became their life. They would be told kiddingly, or not so kiddingly, by friends, family, and other hackers to 'get a life.' No definite documentation or dates for this, however.

The first big-time use of the word in the media was in a 1987 Saturday Night Live skit in which William Shatner, Captain Kirk of Star Trek, does a parody on Trekkie fans. In the sketch, he is the guest of honor at a Star Trek convention. He is asked by fanatical fans wearing pointy ears, several trivia questions concerning the exact combinations of safes he had opened on various episodes (e.g. what was the combination to the safe in episode #38?). He tells these people at the end of the skit to 'move out of your mothers basement' and GET A LIFE...

From the American Heritage Dictionary of Idioms


get a life

Acquire some interests or relationships of one's own. For example, Stop sitting around and complaining-get a life. [Slang; late 1900s]

From the Jargon Dictionary: Get a life! imperitive. Hacker-standard way of suggesting that the person to whom it is directed has succumbed to terminal geekdom (see computer geek). Often heard on Usenet, esp. as a way of suggesting that the target is taking some obscure issue of theology too seriously. This exhortation was popularized by William Shatner on a 1987 "Saturday Night Live" episode in a speech that ended "Get a life!", but some respondents believe it to have been in use before then. It was certainly in wide use among hackers for years before achieving mainstream currency via the sitcom "Get A Life" in 1990.

(extracts from the "Wordwizard" site)

MMMMMmmmmm sugar (very important to unlocking your own peter pan <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> )

Rince, I bow before you <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" /> - Jeez, never thought of looking this phrase up in the internet - I really have to learn - thank you a ton <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kissyou.gif" alt="" />

BTW, I never liked the macho role Shatner played in Star Trek => I'm changing my mind now - care to found a fan club? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

Kiya <thinking of all those wasted hours where Star Trek/Star wars fans tried to explain these worlds and got lost in details, whereas I had difficulties in keeping awake or feigning an interested facial expression>

Some good replies here, some way too philosophical though.
To me the phrase 'get a life' has always meant 'be normal' or 'do something normal instead of rotting in front of a monitor all day'. Sometimes used by the wife.....
What the hell is normal anyway? Personally, the normallity of my existence changes from day to day, as does my life. What I'm trying to say is that whatever you do you should like doing and let that be your life.

'Get a life' is basically a conformist statement IMO.

Short rant over with. Better get back to work. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

yep i agree with womble's defination, except for a bit more added on

well the phrase 'get a life' to a 14 yr old mean to me, is either that you are a loser, or a pervert, or you just have no life-you don't go out stay in all the time and 'spend to much on the computer'<--bit like me <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Actually I reckon this phrase is almost a product of the technological age. It seems that society has been divided by the PC. There are those who know how to use them and enjoy it and there are those who are, frankly, jealous. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

I've used this phrase often as a retort when I saw my flatmates lounging around watching godawful soap operas or just wasting time in front of the TV. Yet they could never understand why I would spend hours in front of my computer....
Still, a long time ago. It appears I 'have a life' now. Or at least a wife. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ouch.gif" alt="" />

why do people actually like watching soap operas, i seen one, omg so boring went on and on and on and on..(10minutes later)...and on and on, whoops gots a bit carried away.

yep everyone is jealous of me cause i know how to use my computer to have fun <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

n gd for you, you 'have a life', dunno if i have one just yet

Even worse : The poorer countries cannot afford huge lcenses made by big companies. They are more or less " cut off" the "Internet Information Stream" - unless they use Open Source products.

great stuff... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/up.gif" alt="" />....all of it and it all applies...
good job Rince... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Hmmm soaps eh? "GAL" fer sure... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
but computers all day is OK! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
it's a learning thing! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ouch.gif" alt="" />

in one sense or another... it's one of those multi=purpose words

[color:"yellow"] Jeez, never thought of looking this phrase up in the internet[/color]

good thing, too... you might not have posted, and this has been an interesting thread <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

[color:"yellow"]I never liked the macho role Shatner played in Star Trek [/color]

didn't think much of him, myself, until i realized he plays it with tongue stuck firmly in cheek. he's got a great sense of self-mockery, and has done some wonderful spoofs of Captain James T. Kirk over the years.

and he is actually a funny guy.....
or tries to be.. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

my life is calling....

actually it's my stomach calling...... gotta eat!

what a life! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Hm, they needn't be jealous, they may only feel excluded, this involves a whole bunch of emotions - and one of them might be jealousy - but I believe, a lot really deals with "norms" being "normal", "normative" => fitting into a little labeled box saying: "I'm like the rest, I'm like you". (Reminds me of a swarm piranhas - if one dances out of the line - normally ill - the rest turns on it and kills it.)

If social contact is the key to having a "life" regardless of its quality, I'd call this "life" as empty, shallow and running away from "life" as locking oneself in a room and staring on the screen. I think a "life" deserves this name if one feels happy with what one's doing => alive - be it collecting stamps, reading, gardening etc. => all not very social interests.

What really fascinates me about this phrase "get a life" is that specially PC people use it a lot themselves. So I ask myself: are they insecure of what they're doing? Do they feel "not ok" by doing this? Why do they use this phrase coming originally from non-PC-junkies? do some consider themselves secretly to be "nerds, geeks"... forgot the 3rd word.

And about illusions in a virtual world => lies, hiding, making up etc. exist in the real world as well as in the virtual world, I see no difference - even physical contact, body language etc. does not prevent one from this.
Kiya

I have a very strenuous job involving a lot of social contacts, so I cherish these silent hours in front of the screen - just the game and me - when I come home and am totally drained. I'm glad I can shut out some senses (talking and listening) - the thought of sitting in a crowded loud pub and listening again to people with the same, neverchanging problems is not really attractive for me or watching them get drunk, or quarrel or whatever. I think some people are hermits and others homo sociologicus - plurality is the mix.

and look what hit the newswires today:

LONDON (Reuters) - The typical Internet user -- far from being a geek -- shuns television and actively socializes with friends, a study on surfing habits said Wednesday.

The findings of the first World Internet Project report present an image of the average Netizen that contrasts with the stereotype of the loner "geek" who spends hours of his free time on the Internet and rarely engages with the real world.

Instead, the typical Internet user is an avid reader of books and spends more time engaged in social activities than the non-user, it says. And, television viewing is down among some Internet users by as much as five hours per week compared with Net abstainers, the study added.

lol ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

yep yep yep <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
good points kiya
man... you can go deep can't ya! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

[color:"orange"] Netizen [/color]

Did my little eye spy a new word there, cause in the past heck err 6-7 years on the net I have never heard that one ?

Even I heard this before ! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

For me 'Get a Life' means get your nose out of my life and worry about yourself.

Dear members of the forum, I'd like to inform you about a decision growing within myself since 2nd Jan. 2004:

I spent a lot of my scarce leisure time here - and loved it when I felt happy/content, saw it as a constructive and educational way on a voluntary free basis - my gain was energy for my job and learning.

It has changed now. Spam and ups/downs in this virtual social atmosphere seem to belong together like 2 sides of the coin. I observed them as floods - and I have been involved in one too many now. Each high tide left me back a bit more worn out, aggravated, fed up and disgusted. So, I started to ask myself the following questions:

Is this a phenomenon, regardless of individual, gender, age, nationality? => yes
Do I accept its inevitable existance? => yes
Do I like it? => nope
Can I change it or at least my attitude towards it? => nope
Can I control the destructive impact it has on myself (emotional hygiene)? => nope
Can I ignore it and simply concentrate on the positive sides? => nope

Conclusion => I choose to spend my future free time with things I feel happy with - in a peaceful, spamless, silent atmosphere, in my own way.

I thank those who provided me with fun, contact, friendliness, warmth and laughter.

Farewell and take care <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wave.gif" alt="" />

Kiya

PS: Please, leave this post uncommented, if you can - I do NOT intend to open another futile debate about spam, I merely wish to inform you - thanks in advance for respecting this.

I have no more tolerance, patience and humour to offer - only my honesty and my self-honesty. My decision does not involve no more engagement for <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/beyond.gif" alt="" /> or <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/div.gif" alt="" /> - so, Goldy, you'll get further new screenies <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

This is actualla a very important topic that you posted here Kiya..
Why??
For me the frase "Get a Life" is as you said it almost every time meant in a Negative way.. The reason is that the people who says it dont have the life they wants,or dreams off..
In Norway we have this new thing, SMS programs at night on the tube.. There people is sending in SMS to be read on the screen,they chat about nothing and everything.. What I have noticed there is that there is always someone that sais "What do you people do this for? using money to chat at TV, get a life"
There is the frase used again.. "GEt a life" Then I tend to wonder.. Why in the heavens name do they complain about people chatting there?? When they obvissly are doing it themselves?? It is not that they are looking down on the people that is doing it, they dont like themselves.. They have a poor selfimage and to compansate for that they talk negative about others.. Too feel good about themselves.. So my point is: If you just accept who you are and what you are doing, this problem wouldnt be an issue..
I know that this never is happening, the human mind is to complex.. But if we are doing it and always are positive, we can influence other "negative" people too get more positive attitude.. Becouse who doesnt want to have a good life..

Ftr: My answer to your 4. question is: A life to get is a life were you are happy with yoursel and your enviroment.. That you like yourself..

People say "Get a life" to infer that the person whey are talking to is a loser and incredibly lame. It's an incredibly weak insult used only by those who have the brainpower of a cactus, a deformed catus at that.

Wtf? Why are people surprised by this? This should be common sense, not a newsflash. I mean, if the person is in front of their computer monitor they aren't in front of their TV monitor, in most cases.

When they did the study, they should have counted hours in front of the computer the same as spending time in front of a TV. It is the same after all. You're just sitting there vegging while staring at a monitor. There is no difference.

So... our beloved mr Gates became somewhat rich by just "vegging"? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/think.gif" alt="" />

Mr Gates did not get his money by sitting in front of a computer posting on forums and chatting in chatrooms and playing online games.

Well, actually Microsoft bought up "QDOS", developed by someome else, and sold it to IBM, for their new PC.

There is a rumor about a failed meeting with IBM ambassaddors <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> and the head of another company which made the OS CP/M (sorry, but I've forgot the name. It was something with "digital"). Thus Microsoft got their brand-new bought OS into the PC, and not the other company.

Besides that, I've once seen a quotation that was said to be from Bill Gates' own biography, saying that he was fishing bad ideas out of peoples dustbins for considering (and maybe later use). <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

Yeah but Mickey, you said "they should have counted hours in front of the computer the same as spending time in front of a TV." People who write software and the like, do that all day. Even surfing on the Internet is part of that, for support and example code, for example. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> As for forums and chats - even those can be part of the work. There's plenty computer language forums out there, and although some go there for fun, others occasionally visit them for a living - so to speak. Or you could just have a chat while you're working.
My point is - sitting in front of the television, you can only watch. But sitting before a computer screen, even when surfing the Net, you can be doing more than watching. You can make things, you can actually do something.
So no, I don't think it's the same <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

Fine, let me rephrase this so my words can't be nitpicked. :P

Hours spent in front of the computer goofing off should be counted the same as watching TV.

Except that a TV to write and therfore communicate with others. TV is one-way, whereas Computer is normally two-way , I believe.

Another thing is the flow of information : Other than changing the TV programme you don't have much of a choice. The ability abd possibility to choose is imho much greater with the Internet.

Wothout ... well, that's not so good.

TV is totally different than Computer..
what interaction do you have with TV.?
How many "channels" does the internet have? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />
Comp is one of the ultimate learning tools of these times...

oh yes its a great time waster but also it can be a great producer for you as well...lets see TV do that! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Yeah, I could agree with that <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Doh!! and what about teaching 12 years ago I didn't know nothing about Computers, closed thing was my super hetrodyne calculater (used 3 aa Batteries) and my Sega, then I bought an IBM 486 sx and I learned about DOS and Windows, I learned about websites internet connections, how to make a letter/document, about fonts, even how to manipulate images.

The only thing I learned from TV is how to use the "Mute" button in regards to Commercials <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Yeah, guess what? You're still goofing off, and your still sitting on your butt staring at a monitor. :P



Yeah, guess what? You're still goofing off, and your still sitting on your butt staring at a monitor. :P

You can use TV to learn and educate yourself. there's plenty of channels for that. I've seen a few myself.

ok......i'll do that! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Hello everyone,

I haven't posted a long time on this website but I'd like to give my answer to these questions.

Kiya states:
"As the older members already know, I'm a newbie in this internet world - and I have wondered very often, why the sentence "get a life" is used so often in this virtual world and very seldom meant in a friendly way.

1.Well, what is this "life I/you/others should get"?
2.What does it involve?
3.What does it exclude?
4.What is your personal definition of a "life to get"?
5.Why is a "life" (spending time on the internet) not a "life" - and if it is not a "life", what is it then?

Please, try to stick to the questions I posted - I really want to understand. Refrain from spamming if you can - I've tried very often to understand the meaning - up to now: in vain.
Kiya"

This phrase is often used when someone is spending too much time on one task to the exclusion of almost everything else. It is also used when someone is doing the same things every day. To get a life is to constantly open yourself to what is new. Basically, if you're doing the same things over and over again, you are not living but dying because death is stagnation where nothing is changing. In reality, it is hard to sustain this for a long time because the natural state of things is change. There is off course those who are living but who feel drained both physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. They are alive but there is no life in their lives. Living 'becomes automatic, a dead process.'...Locked by conditioning. There's no freshness, vitality, and more importantly. awareness. It's almost as if you're sleepwalking through life dragging yourself from one day to the other. I know it because I've experienced it before. I'd like to quote from Instant Analysis by Joe Lieberman, "The more automated your life is-the wider the gap between reality and your perception of reality, moving you farther into your own little world. Most serious mental illness can find their root in this gap." So to get a life may also mean to look at the truth of what's happening...to wake up and smell the coffee so to speak. A person who has no life is run by conditioning. They may also have some habits that are hard to break such as being online too much, watching too much tv, spending too much time inside, etc...Of course, if you're someone who is like Leonardo Da Vinci who I think spent most of his day painting, then you have a life?!? A person who has passion for what he/she is doing will bypass sleep sometimes to do it but hey...he/she loves it and would do it even if they didn't receive any monetary compensation. It's their passion. It's their life. May they rise up and live it. Find your passion...eh?

Thank you.

damn...
i finally decide to stop in and say hello and kiy is gone! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/disagree.gif" alt="" />
hope everyone else is doing well. i miss the discussions! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

for those that might question why i left, it may very well have been along the same lines as the 'get a life' comments...
i found trying to defend my personal humanity and my country's actions far more fatiguing than rewarding.
it's never good to have the self-righteous attitude of a teenager, and even less appealing when deliberately used to slam people - this especially when your 'facts' or 'ideals' or 'morals' are subjective (at best) and, more likely faulty in their premise.

who knows, perhaps bringing to front these issues is a positive and enlightening thing. discussions and even arguments are an inherently good, intriguing, enriching experience. slams are a waste of time, energy, character and grace.
hopefully we learn.....
lego

I am sorry I have missed this discussion.

As for TV and computers, common between both is that both belong to entertaining industry. Sure thy can use it rather for entertaining or educating purposes. As you can watch CNN, discovery, animal planet on TV you can do the same on net. Net has more options, it has much greater capacity.

Sure, both sources have a lot of junk.
As it was sayd in "the Wall" about TV - "I have got 64 channels of s**t to choose from."

So, it is up to us how to use these sources.

As for Kiya. I am sorry, she left. I think there is more good things happening in our small community than bad things like offence or spam. But, this is her decision, there is nothing to do with it. Maybe she will think over this and return. Or at least hope to meet again with arrival of Beyond Divinity.

get a life... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/kitty.gif" alt="" />