Can someone show what a FR/ethereal elf looks like?
You'd be surprised at how loose the 'official' descriptions actually are. Like most things in a fantasy setting, the actual look is largely down to your own interpretation. Yes, there are pictures of FR elves available, but they are simply someone else's interpretation of an imaginary being. Nobody can show you what one looks like because they don't exist, but you can certainly get inspiration for your own version from looking at pictures other people have drawn. A quick Google will find no shortage of elf pictures. None are any more or less 'canon' than the others.
I would also point out that there is nothing to say that your version is originally from Faerun. FR is a large place and you could have grown up elsewhere. A KaraTur elf (for example) might look different to a Faerun elf. The Forgotten Realms is not Faerun, there are many more areas and, logically, many variations on the different races/species that live there.
I eventually got something that I was Ok with and close to the lore, but now my char looks totally weird and out of place among the other characters. There’s something about DnD where everyone wants everything to be fantastical, but it’s a lot harder to translate that into this medium and keep it believable than you think.
You can’t have a cartoon, a stop-motion character, a muppet, a bear and a person all standing around having a conversation. And that’s kind of what we’re always asking for. If we got it we wouldn’t like it.
Yeah, some people like odd-looking characters. Everyone wants their character to be in some way special in an RPG (I'm no exception), and you do tend to see some right monsters out there. Be strong and stick with your own vision, It's your game.