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And finally New Rule: You don't have to teach both sides of a debate, if one side is a load of crap.

Now, President Bush recently suggested that public schools should teach intelligent design, alongside the theory of evolution. Because, after all, evolution is quote, "just a theory." Then the President renewed his vow to drive the terrorists straight over the edge of the earth.

Now, here is what I don't get. President Bush is a brilliant scientist. He's the man who proved you can mix two parts booze with one part cocaine, and still fly a jet fighter. And yet... yet he just can't seem to accept that we descended from apes.

It just seems pathetic to be so insecure about your biological superiority, to a group of feces-flinging, rouge-buttocked monkeys, that you have to make up fairy tales. Like we came from Adam and Eve, and then cover stories for Adam and Eve like, intelligent design. Yeah, leaving the Earth in the hands of two naked teenagers. That's a real intelligent design.

I'm sorry, folks, but it may very well may be that life is just a series of random events. And that there is no... master plan. But enough about Iraq. Let me instead restate my thesis. There aren't necessarily two sides to every issue. If there were, the Republicans would have an opposition party.

And an opposition party would point out that even though there's a debate, in schools, and government, about this, there is no debate among scientists. Evolution... is supported by the entire scientific community. Intelligent design is supported by guys online to see "The Dukes of Hazzard."

And the reason there is no real debate, is that intelligent design isn't real science. It's the equivalent of saying that the thermos keeps hot things hot and cold things cold, because it's a god. It's so willfully ignorant you might as well worship the U.S. Mail. It came again! Praise, Jesus!

No, stupidity isn't a form of knowing things. Thunder is high pressure air meeting low pressure air. It's not God bowling. Babies come from storks is not a competing school of thought... in medical school. We shouldn't teach both. The media shouldn't equate both. If Thomas Jefferson...

If Thomas Jefferson knew we were blurring the line this much between church and state, he would turn over in his slave. Now as for me, I believe in evolution and intelligent design. I think God designed us in his image, but I also think God is a monkey! God bless you and goodnight!

Bill Maher


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OK, I'll try to comment this later. For now I will just sit in shocked silence.

Übereil


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I noticed there was a lot of references to jesus and god in there. So where's their proof of that? All they are truely saying is:

1. that the theory of gravity is flawed.
2. We don't understand how it works.
3. Therefore it must be god.

Science has the hard part. It has to prove everything in order to gain support. Relgious people need no proof of anything, because they can always play their trump card... God.

Everything needed to create the universe, is in the universe.


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The Onion is a satire / spoof publication (website and short radio clips), not a real newspaper. I can see where you could miss that, though, since it is not funny.

The very first 'article' I saw of The Onion was funny, so I started going through the back issues and only found a couple that got up to slightly amusing. The few radio clips I've heard have just been stupid.

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You're right. There's nothing funny about it at all. I didn't read it all though, but I obviously didn't miss anything then. The funny sites in the other threads are better.

That site seems to have the same purpose as intelligent design <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />


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...

So it is all fake? Seriouslly? They're not putting something THIS stupid up in American schools? Why didn't you say so right away <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/memad.gif" alt="" />? I got nervous there! I even posted it in anouther forum...

Übereil


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Reminds me of the 1938 broadcast of Orson Well's War Of the Worlds... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ROFL.gif" alt="" />


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Sorry about the confusion! I think the Onion relies on their reputation as a satire for their articles. Of course a reputation is only as good as the distance it's travelled.

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Quote
since it is not funny.


ROFL

raze pwn3d The Onion. Satire is a very difficult thing to get away with. most satire sites are not funny.


Raze gains +2 respect in my book.

any way the onion is wrong. Newton law of gravity is a law meaning it has been proved and considered unbreakable (if you do find a flaw => nobel prize)

Thats why creationism is still bieng mentioned. Evoluion is not a law. you can't create a matimatical formula that when you implement it it comes out human after thousands of years.


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Watch the daily show this week. It's the Evolution Smevolution week.

Daily show


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Hmmmmmmmmm at least THIS makes sense <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/stupid.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/stupid.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/stupid.gif" alt="" />

(not to be against females... but its well done regardless)

Equasions of life.... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/stupid.gif" alt="" />


Your existence alone, is excuse enough for the creation of the entire universe… Il you my darling Jeanne-Dré 
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lol, it funnier when it says woman are evil, (root of evil <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />)


It's one of these days...
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I cant say THAT about my own species!!!! so i'll just stick to the facts <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />


Your existence alone, is excuse enough for the creation of the entire universe… Il you my darling Jeanne-Dré 
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