Larian Studios Forums General Chat Chat (Anything) Horror movie "NEVER"s

Things you never do in a horror movie, either as a character or as the guy who is making the movie.

I have some opinions, and I'll get the ones off the top of my head, but there are soooo many.

Give me some personal opions people. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />


So, here's a few (to the movie makers):
Zooming
If a monster is visible in the screen, never zoom out from it, or zoom in. And, never ever ever zoom in and out a few times.

All this why? Noone will take your movie seriously from that point forward. You're making it look like some underpayed film from the sixties.

They did something like this in Doom, which damn near destroyed it. For example, in the battle in the electrified pit-room. The guy starts swinging around a computer monitor by its cord (he's screaming like he's losing the battle at this point, but he's not). The swinging computer looks fake-ish. His expression looks fake-ish. At a point during this it shows the monster, and it looks like a small version of one-a-the original godzillas (just standing there, waving his head and arms around). <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/memad.gif" alt="" /> Angry am I, ye-es! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/badsmile2.gif" alt="" /> Then thre rest of that scene was a disaster not worth complaining about.

But I liked the movie. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> I very much enjoyed it . They had some tasteful stuff, and some good ideas. They just fugged up at some parts like the one mentionned above, making it look like something they could'a made tens of years ago. But, if you're a Doom fan, watch the movie. Its fun pointing the similarities. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/delight.gif" alt="" />

BFG 9000!!!! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" />

Killerzzz

Don't use literally gallons of blood. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" /> Like in From Dusk Till Dawn. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Never ever use a stupid blond Paris Hilton type to go and check where "that strange noise" came from <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ouch.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />

If you are a person in the horror movie, never say: "Lets split up."!!! Good idea. You'll find the killer quicker that way. It won't make you easier to pick off at all. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Another thing (quite related), if you and another person are in a house with the killer, and you know it, and you hear a strange noise that your companion does not: don't go check what it is alone. For goodness sake, you've got someone right next to you to get your back, but you feel compelled to walk right into the killer's trap. Smart. You deserve a cookie. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/stupid.gif" alt="" />
(sorry if its a bit like what you said Galadriel, but I had to emphisize <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> )

Thats all for now. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Killerzzz

Or in Kill Bill 1& 2 <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

And yes, Killerzzz, it was quite the same as I said before, but we know where it came from don't we? Yes we do, yes we do *Gal tickles Killerzzz under his chin* <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />

Don't keep your butcherknifes presenting in your kitchen, just for the killer to grab! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> (Psycho sound is playing here!) <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Never use the words "strange noise". <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

Don't use some high pitched sound music (say, violin-like) for trying to create suspense atmosphere... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" />

But then again, don't use Devo either. You can't have a serious chase to the tunes of Whip it...

Übereil

Don't cast a black actor, a stupid blond and a good looking couple for the starring roles, it kills the ending <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/evilgrin1.gif" alt="" />

Don't let the pretty girl take a shower in a murder case... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Exaggerated screaming (but that goes for another kind of movies too <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> )

Just plain don't make any more movies about the "Living Dead" for, like, 10 years! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> I mean, there's been sooo many in the last few years... its getting old.

Don't ever try to make another Halloween (Michael Myers) or Friday the 13th (Jason Vorhese) or Nightmare on Elm Street (Freddy Coogar) movie. Ever. I'm sorry people, but the magic is gone.

Halloween Ressurection was boring, fake, crappy story, pointless, dragging and a series of other critisisms. Can't say much more other than: If you wanna hate a movie, go watch this one. Lets trow in 'Tasteless' too for good mesure. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Jason X... noone wants to talk about it. They made it more of a humourus porno than anyting els (there was only one nudity scene, but thats all anyone noticed anyhow <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> ). Jason put two nude women holligrams in sleepingbags (for some reason they put him in a holligram reality in a forest and tried to saduce him with the ladies... tried to seduce Jason... <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/suspicion.gif" alt="" /> ) and beat one with the other. I was laughing troughout that movie more than I... I don't even remember what most of I was about...

Freddy vs. Jason: Everyone hates you, Mr. Movie. I have not seen it, but I know some hardcore Jason, Myres, and Freddy fans that have and they spat on it (some literally <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/winkwink.gif" alt="" /> ). I saw two scenes: one proved to have some decently tasteful ideas, the other proved crappy. One thing that disgusted me is what my brother told me: they effing knock Freddy out! You can't knock him out! He's a being from another demention that goes and kills you in your dreams! He's the fugging BoogieMan for fudge's sake! (like my cencoring? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" /> )

So, yea, give up. No more of their movies. It seems its over. Watch the good, sweet oldies over and over and love'em. Thats all thats left.

Killerzzz

P.S.: Wiew, I was pretty pissed. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" /> Been bottling that up for a while. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/badsmile2.gif" alt="" />

LOL

And jason donovan? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

I found that freddy VS jason a pretty good movie for that gerne (don't like those movies anyway...)

For an attack at the good ole Halloween and Friday the 13th movies, how the heck is the killer so fast?

You see the victim (hot actress ? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ohh.gif" alt="" /> ) running as fast as possible (like the wind!) and for some reason Myers or Vorhese is walking casually after them but keeping up anyhow.

Vic:"AAAAAAH! AAAAAAAAAAH! AAAAAAAAAH! RUNNING AS FAST AS I CAN! AAAAH!"

Kil:"Imma just walkin along, see, and imma keep up with you anyhow. Hehe. Gunna kill you good now, ya hear?"

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/suspicion.gif" alt="" />

I like those movies (bigtime horror fan overhere *points at self* <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/stupid.gif" alt="" /> ) but man, I love to critisize them. So many things can go wrong in a horror film because its a tough atmosphere to maintain. Thats jussa way it is.

Killerzzz

How to make a horror movie seem like just a bad and not even scary at all movie: cover up your ears, all scaryness is just tension build by the music, soundeffects etc...

Everytime I watch such movies I'm think "OK now nothing is going to happen, to obvious... bet ya someone dies now"). Nope not scary at all, horror movies are to scare 14 year old girls, and to entertain older ppl with gore.

Another tip for horror film makers to get their act together is this...

Step AWAY from the the computer!!

CGI is NOT scary...no way, no how!

If I wanted to see computer generated monsters jumping around I'll play a computer game! It's like watching Saturday morning cartoons. Example, the end of Van Helsing (god-awful film) - the 2 CGI monsters fighting at the end had all the excitment of a Tom and Jerry cartoon! No wait, thats an insult to Tom and Jerry cartoons!

The creature, what ever it is, has to be tangible, other wise its faker than if you used a washing up bottle and some sticky tape to make it.

Speaking of music and soundeffects...

I've run this by a few people before and they all agree.

Say you have a scene where you have the killer comming in and shooting somone. If you have music that is serious or loud, you go "oh no! someone died!". But if you have some three stooges music or something out of a carnival or a good old " waaa-waaa " in the same scene, you'd probably end it laughing.

Its pretty sickening the way it works: its all in the music. If the music is scary or serious, then the movie gets scary or serious. Now play some funny music from the loony toons or sesame street during the same movie, and it'll be more like Scary Movie ( a comedy) than an actual "scary movie".

If ya know what I mean. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/silly.gif" alt="" />

Killerzzz

Never forget the phrase 'Klatu Verata Nicto'! How damn hard is that anyway!!?

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/biggrin.gif" alt="" />

But...but...she's hot. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/disagree.gif" alt="" />