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Re: Why the aggressive 5e Feedback? [Re: DistantStranger] #731364
09/11/20 11:52 PM
09/11/20 11:52 PM
Joined: Oct 2020
Posts: 935
Firesnakearies Offline
old hand
Firesnakearies  Offline
old hand

Joined: Oct 2020
Posts: 935
Originally Posted by DistantStranger
Originally Posted by Firesnakearies
Originally Posted by DistantStranger
I think the game works incredibly well as it is. My only real objection is I would like greater reactivity of choices and their consequences, a lot tighter writing, more nuance in the storytelling, and appreciate more convincing characters. For me, everything more or less works well enough that all anything needs is a little fine tuning, but the writing is just so. . .mediocre. However, I have been fascinated with history and the humanities all my life and I imagine my standards for excellence are somewhat higher than the typical consumer for this type of project.



Not gonna lie, I don't even know what the phrase "tighter writing" means.


Think Hemingway. Choosing efficacy over the extraneous. Poetry and prose have their place, but when they become distracting or directionless they can fatigue the reader. At that point, one needs to pare back on their composition. Its shedding the fat, because lean writing can do more work with greater efficiency.



Ah, now I see why I didn't know what it meant. I'm incapable of writing like that. I can't even make a shopping list without it becoming a 10,000-word novella. To me, more words is always better.

Re: Why the aggressive 5e Feedback? [Re: Firesnakearies] #731370
10/11/20 12:07 AM
10/11/20 12:07 AM
Joined: Oct 2020
Posts: 201
DistantStranger Offline
enthusiast
DistantStranger  Offline
enthusiast

Joined: Oct 2020
Posts: 201
Originally Posted by Firesnakearies



Ah, now I see why I didn't know what it meant. I'm incapable of writing like that. I can't even make a shopping list without it becoming a 10,000-word novella. To me, more words is always better.


+1

I know. It is a struggle

Re: Why the aggressive 5e Feedback? [Re: DistantStranger] #731394
10/11/20 12:56 AM
10/11/20 12:56 AM
Joined: May 2020
Posts: 162
Traycor Offline
member
Traycor  Offline
member

Joined: May 2020
Posts: 162
Originally Posted by DistantStranger
Originally Posted by Nyanko


I personally think the writing is fine as it is for a game of this size. There are many good novels out there that you would find not so compelling if you had only a third of the whole story in hand. And it's exactly what we got in EA. So stating the writing is bad without having the full arc of certain characters is kind of premature.


I hate to break it to you, but beta readers and editors do precisely this a great deal of the time. Creatives rarely produce good copy initially. The process usually involves distilling things toward their most primal elements (chapters, scenes, and arcs) going over the chemistry then pooling it back together to see how it all looks. Sausages and novels are made in much the same way ;P

EDIT: Also, sticking the landing doesn't excuse a poor launch. In bits or as a whole everything needs to work.

+1

Revise, revise, revise.

Then get feedback and revise, revise, revise.

Then once you have it almost perfect... revise again.

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