Santa: "That'll only make him bite harder Rudolf. Wait till I've finished peeing down this chimney and I'll come and stick my finger up its butt. That usually works!"

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" Road rage, air rage. Why should I be forced to divide my rage into seperate categories? To me, it's just one big, all-around, everyday rage. I don't have time for distinctions. I'm too busy screaming at people. " -George Carlin