For me, the measure of whether or not something is cheese is, "Would this actually work in a realistic world that isn't run by a computer AI?" or "Would this fly if you were playing D&D with a real Dungeon Master?" If it fails one test, it's moderately cheesy, if it fails both then it's super cheese.
Most of the things you can "get away with" in these games that end up giving you an unfair advantage or trivializing content only work because the game programming is limited and cannot react o.r adapt to what you are doing. When you are no longer using the rules of the system, but instead abusing the limitations of programming, I think it's cheese.
Part of the fun of these d&d computer games for me is in breaking them in creative ways - because its just a computer program rather than a living human DM. Like poverty runs, or soloing full tactics mod BGII, or HoF IWD2. Its just fun breaking a mechanical puzzle.