Who was talking about fetishes? I wasn't. In fact I agree with everything you said about fetishism in gaming. I find it distasteful as well. I find fan service crass, and I grit my teeth any time someone says "waifu". (I feel dirty just having typed that word.) I think the stuff you're talking about is gross, too.
I'm just talking about, in a game which is already a massive power fantasy in every other respect, having the character your character likes also like your character seems pretty reasonable. When people fantasize about being a character in a fantasy world, they probably don't fantasize about people NOT being attracted to that character. I could be wrong, maybe there's a bit subset of people craving some good rejection experiences in their RPGs.
I also agree with you about the hyper part. That's a very different thing from merely being playersexual, and I think it's definitely a problem. The part where suddenly every party member wants to sleep with you (or talk about sleeping with you) at the same time is really poorly done, in my opinion, and I hope they change it. It comes across right now as very weird.
People are not only playing RPGs for power fantasies. I would even say those people are the minority. Story and immersion are a big part of classig RPGs in the style of Baldurs Gate and its successors like Planescape or Kingmaker. And both story and immersion get damaged by playersexual companions. Ones gender and in fantasy worlds racial preferences are part of ones personality. Yet if all characters have to be playersexual you can't touch those parts of the personality, meaning you can only write bland cookie cutter characters which are open to everything. How do you write someone like Jubilost (Kingmaker) who is full of himself and thinks everyone is beneath him when he will have sex with low int barbarians (who he does not respect at all) just because thats what the player plays? Or Harrim (Kingmaker again) who is a disillusioned priest waiting for the universe, or at least his own life, to end. Him having a romance would completely be out of character, so why should he have one. Even Bi characters who are by default player sexual are more memorable when being bi is part of their character and not just happens by coincidence (Octiavia and Regongar, last Kingmaker reference I promise).
And thats just gender. There are also racial preferences. Just take Shadowheart. She hates Githyanki, but will do you after a few days of knowing you because you are the player. This is just eye rollingly bad and devalues her personality.
Originally Posted by Firesnakearies
I'm not sure how "companions are attracted to whatever gender the PC is" equals fetishes? I like romance in RPGs for numerous reasons, but not as something to be sexually exciting. I would prefer if they didn't even have explicit sex scenes, but merely fade to black. And I do think the "hitting on" part needs to be toned way down. Maybe if ONE character is like that, it would make sense. As THAT character's personality trait. (Astarion in particular would fit this.) But when they ALL do it, it stands out glaringly and immediately feels ham-fisted.
Think of those japanese harem style dating sims/visual novels. One guy in the middle of a group of girls who all want him and compete with each other for his affection and in the best end he gets them all. Playersexuality is basically this.