All characters are altering themselves, to be with your pc, and they are being scripted to be with your pc, no matter what you do, or why you do it.
That specifically is what I am speaking against.
A separate issue outside the scope of my observations here.
For what its worth I am in complete agreement. I am not interested in RPG romances myself. In as much as I am interested, however, it is in that they are so tastelessly and terribly written. I would like to see them more carefully executed even if it is content I would never bother with myself. I have spoken about the issue of every companion dry fucking the protagonist's leg in a separate thread, however, which is why I feel little necessity to discuss it any further here.
In this conversation, I am solely focused on whether NPCs should be pursued romantically, by whom, and to what extent. I think virtually everyone would be satisfied if NPCs did not initiate romances but responded rather to the direction and desire of the individual playing. If you do not care for romances, then you would never see them. If you wish to pursue someone, then you have the ability to do so and may even be successful -regardless of what you are playing and how.